


my mind is running around (her)

by fxbricxtedrexlity



Category: ITZY (Band)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Domestic Fluff, F/F, Fluff and Smut, Friends to Lovers, G!P, Mutual Pining, They're still idols, alpha!yeji, just abo lmao, omega!ryujin
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:08:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 20,314
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26333851
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fxbricxtedrexlity/pseuds/fxbricxtedrexlity
Summary: ::Yeji’s hands slipped away from her, wrapping around Ryujin’s waist slowly, one palm landing in between Ryujin’s shoulder blades, and her chin hooked on Ryujin’s shoulder.Yeji hugs just as consuming as her smile.Yeji hugs just like how every planet spin around the sun.Yeji—“It’s real,” is whispered against the fabric of her shirt. “, it’s so close now and it’s real.”A laugh fights its way out of Ryujin’s lungs. “Oh my god, you’re so clingy that the universe decided to put us in a group.”With Yeji pressed so close against her, Ryujin canfeelher laughter more than hear it. And it’ssomuch better. “I’m not clingy,” if Ryujin looks now, Yeji will have her tongue in between her teeth, smug. “, I just meet you halfway.”Ryujin melts.::ryeji. friends-to-lovers idol au with an abo twist of alpha!yeji meeting omega!ryujin. whole itzy ensemble as well :)
Relationships: Hwang Yeji/Shin Ryujin
Comments: 7
Kudos: 135





	1. :: chapter i ::

**Author's Note:**

>   
> a tad bit of warning before you proceed :)  
> this fic contains explicit sexual content and a woman with a penis but it’s not till the second chapter  
> if you want just the fluff, the first chapter is pretty much it lmao  
> if some of the warnings put you off, please press the back button now :)  
> relationship between itzy’s yeji and ryujin  
> i respect each and every one of the characters and real people i used in this fic
> 
> I guess that’s all, please enjoy :)  
> 

my mind is running around (her)

**::**

this story is for a friend

**::**

_surround me_

_hold me deep beneath your weight_

_and every night my mind_

_is running around her_

_then it’s getting louder_

_and louder and louder_

_baby, you’re like_

_lightning in a bottle_

_i can’t let you go_

_now that i got it_

_electric love; børns_

**::**

_ryeji. friends-to-lovers idol au with an abo twist of alpha!yeji meeting omega!ryujin. whole itzy ensemble as well (:_

**::**

Yeji thinks there’s a Ryujin-shaped _thing_ somewhere in her mind, always makes her remember the other girl at absurd times of the day, never fails to bring a smile to her face.

She likes it.

**::**

This is how Ryujin knew:

Her muscles were aching—the kind of ache that feels good, like she earned it—walking along the corridor from the bathroom, the towel slung across a shoulder is damp with her sweat. Their instructor is outside of the practice room, talking with a staff.

“—this weekend, yeah.”

_Huh_.

Other trainees are by the water cooler, beckoning for Ryujin to come over the moment she stepped inside the room.

“Did you know?” One of the older girls asked, handing her a paper cup with cold water. “A new trainee is starting this weekend.”

Ryujin drinks. “I overheard them talking about it outside.”

She slinks away as soon as she finishes her water, faces the mirror, and dropping the towel on top of her bag.

Her muscles are aching but it’s a good ache.

She starts dancing again.

**::**

This is how Yeji knew:

It was a Friday. She was looking down on her shoe— _did I step on a gum? —_ walking home from school when she got the call.

_“Hello, may I speak with Hwang Yeji?”_

It’s crazy how one phone call changed everything.

She gets home with the news at the tip her tongue, out of breath from running as fast as she could, ears ringing, and right cheek still warm from where she was pressing her phone a little bit too hard; hanging on to every word of the staff from human resources just to make sure that she’s _not dreaming_.

Someone screams—her mom, most probably—gushes about how she’s so _proud_ and that they’ll be celebrating tonight. Her sister calls their dad, shooting a proud smile at Yeji when she passes her on the way to her bedroom.

_Oh my god._

Her phone chimes and the screen’s still opened on the contract emailed to her during the phone call. There are two new notifications. One is that she’s been added to a new group chat and the other is that someone sent her a message.

**_Unknown Number [5:22 PM]_ **

_Hi! I heard you’re the new trainee (:_

_May I ask how old are you?_

_I’m Shin Ryujin, btw_

Yeji’s eyes widen. That was fast.

**_Hwang Yeji [5:24 PM]_ **

_Hello! I’m Hwang Yeji, 17 years old_

_Nice to meet you (:_

**_Shin Ryujin JYP [5:25 PM]_ **

_I’ll call you unnie, then_

_I’m 16 (:_

_Nice to meet you too!_

_I’ll tour you around the company tomorrow_

_Is that cool with you?_

**_Yeji-unnie [5:25 PM]_ **

_If it’s not much trouble then I’d love to_

**_Shin Ryujin JYP [5:26 PM]_ **

_It’s not (:_

_I saw your picture_

_You’re really pretty_

Yeji squints, eyes Shin Ryujin’s picture and it’s just of a cat. Huh.

**_Yeji-unnie [5:30 PM]_ **

_Ah thank you so much_

_I’m sure you are too_

**_Shin Ryujin [5:31 PM]_ **

_I’ll hug you tomorrow when I see you_

_Then you’ll know who I am (;_

**_Yeji-unnie [5:44 PM]_ **

_See you tomorrow, then (:_

**_Shin Ryujin [5:45 PM]_ **

_See you!_

She drops to her bed, screams until her lungs are burning and—

_What just happened?_

**::**

It was a bit overwhelming, at first.

A staff greeted her the moment she stepped inside the lobby, showing her which elevator to take to get to where she’ll usually be the fastest, the cafeteria, the restroom nearest to which practice room the trainees will be using and it was a lot to take in.

And oddly enough, lemons. JYPE building smells like lemons. Just a hint, though, recognizable but after a few whiffs, your nose gets used to it.

Huh. Interesting.

Of course, Shin Ryujin’s somewhere on the back of her mind—Yeji’s conscious of her surroundings, wondering if the other girl will follow through the promise of hugging her—but there are also more important things she needs to get through.

Like the surprise—maybe not as much since Shin Ryujin gave her a bit of a heads-up last night—evaluation the trainees have to go through for their first day. It’s not on paper and basically, it’s just to see if they improved or slacked in the time between the final screenings and their first day.

So.

By the time she finished, the evaluation took up her whole morning and a good chunk of the afternoon. And sweated enough through her shirt to be a little self-conscious about it.

“Okay, well, you’re basically done for the day. The group you’ll be joining is practicing in that room, I can introduce you to them if you don’t want to go home just yet.” Then the staff looked at Yeji from head to toe. “Or if you want to join them right away, you can. Your choice.”

There was a glint in his eyes that Yeji didn’t miss, something in her gut is telling that she should step up. The door is heavier than it looks as the staff pushes it and gestures for Yeji to step through first.

The music’s louder inside, girls of different ages are in various stages of resting or lightly practicing choreography in front of the floor-to-ceiling mirrors. Her eyes sweep from faces to faces, wonders if one of them is—

“Alright, ladies, I’m sure you all know that there’s a new trainee. She’ll be grouped with you so do your best to get along.” He makes a big sweeping gesture in front of Yeji and she takes it as a sign to introduce herself.

“Hello, I’m Hwang Yeji, pleased to meet you.”

The staff slinks away with a jerk of his head to Yeji and a motion for the person in charge of the trainees to follow him outside. There’s a canopy of introductions but none of them—

_Soft_.

Arms are encircled around her waist and Yeji feels a cheek pressed against her back. A giggle wracks the body behind her, squeezing her once before the arms loosen.

She turns around—

And it’s _so_ not fair.

**::**

She’s not eavesdropping.

That’s Hwang Yeji, Ryujin’s sure of it; no mistake that she’s even beautiful up close with her long hair tied up in a ponytail and a few strands are standing up like they’re reaching for the sky. She’s not made up, not a single hint of heavy make-up on her face, and the naturalness of her beauty is a bit frightening.

She’s with the same staff their instructor was talking to earlier this week, telling Hwang Yeji that she can go home—Ryujin wishes she doesn’t, _not yet._

She follows when they enter the practice room.

As far as voices go, Ryujin doesn’t think she’s heard a voice that _perfectly_ matches the person. Hwang Yeji’s voice is light, polite, and reflects the same easiness seen in her eyes as she smiles at everyone in the room.

The moment everyone bursts into overlapping voices, Ryujin takes a step.

Hwang Yeji is taller, Ryujin notes, as the other girl ducks her head as she turns around and—

Ryujin gets a front row seat at how completely _awed_ Hwang Yeji’s face got when she catches Ryujin’s eyes.

It’s _so_ not fair.

**::**

The first thing she sees is a bright smile and a scrunched-up nose that reminds her a lot like cat whiskers. Suddenly, Shin Ryujin’s picture in Kakaotalk makes a whole lot of sense.

_She’s so pretty._

Yeji may have been staring a bit too long, feeling herself spacing out for a moment before she had to mentally kick herself and blurt out: _are you Ryujin-ssi?_

“Hi, unnie.”

Even her voice is unfair.

Shin Ryujin is so pretty that Yeji actually feels a little bit scared.

Maybe also a little bit enthralled.

_Oh my god._

**::**

**_Shin Ryujin JYP [9:34 PM]_ **

_*sent a link*_

_Have you seen this?_

**_Yeji-unnie [10:03 PM]_ **

_Ah! Sorry, I was in the shower_

_I have and the way they dance is so TT_

**_Shin Ryujin JYP [10:05 PM]_ **

_Want to learn this with me?_

_I think we can pull it off well_

**_Yeji-unnie [10:06 PM]_ **

_Sure, I’ll beat you at learning faster this time_

**_Shin Ryujin JYP [10:06 PM]_ **

_:p_

**::**

Yeji keeps tabs as the days fly by.

She’s been a trainee for a month and by now it only takes her a second to catch her bearings every time Ryujin hugs her for a greeting.

_Baby steps,_ she thinks, putting her bag beside Ryujin’s at the corner of the practice room and rushes to the younger girl’s side, already starting to do her warm-up exercises. _Baby steps._

**::**

**_Ryujin JYP [7:05 AM]_ **

_Cool_

_See you_

**_Yeji-unnie [7:18 AM]_ **

_There was an accident_

_Not mine but there’s traffic ):_

_Might come in a bit late_

The night she got accepted as a trainee, Yeji’s dad sat her down and told her that there is absolutely _no_ way that she’ll be moving to Seoul for training, which meant traveling from Jeonju to Seoul every weekend.

That’s five hours of traveling a day.

Yeji yawned, still not used to the early hours she needs to wake up, the subtle lemon-scent of JYPE is replaced by… _coffee?_

She blinks.

Ryujin’s in front of her, looking amused, holding two cups.

“Good morning,” is all Ryujin says, a smirk on her lips and walking backward as soon as Yeji took her own cup, laughing when the older girl burns her tongue.

Yeji presses the elevator button, bumping her shoulder with Ryujin’s.

“Good morning.”

She hides her smile behind the lip of the cup. Early mornings don’t seem that bad.

**_Ryujin JYP [7:51 AM]_ **

_I saw that_

They step inside the elevator and Yeji can see her reflection as she rolls her eyes.

**::**

Their instructor had somewhere to be today—a wedding or something—so she did their monthly evaluations yesterday. It’s a Sunday and _technically_ their day off; their instructor even sent a _enjoy the weekend_ message in their group chat.

But Ryujin doesn’t know what to do.

She’s been sitting at the foot of her bed since she woke up and— _it’s only been half an hour_. Her body clock already adjusted, waking up an hour earlier than she usually does to make sure their morning coffee wouldn’t be too cold when Yeji arrives at the building, still groggy from taking a nap on the train.

She looks at the clock again.

Her hair’s still wet when she heads into the building, no coffee in hand. Yeji still hasn’t replied to her last message.

**_Ryujin JYP [7:14 AM]_ **

_You up?_

**_Ryujin JYP [7:35 AM]_ **

_I’m gonna practice today_

_Vid call during?_

_Maybe she’s still asleep?_ Yeji arrived yesterday looking frazzled, staying up late to practice their evaluation piece with Ryujin via video call even though the older girl also had to stay up the night before for an exam. Maybe she’s catching up on sleep or something.

Turns out, it’s both.

There’s soft music playing from the speakers, the lights dimmed to the lowest setting, and Ryujin knows it’s Yeji sleeping on the couch, face pressed against the back cushion, and hair spilling over the edge, the tips reaching the floor.

She drops her bag gently, shaking her head as she fishes out a jacket and drapes it over the older girl. Yeji stirs slightly, burrowing her face deeper against the couch cushion and Ryujin resists the urge to take a picture.

(She caves in, careful to turn off the flash and put her phone on silent.

Yeji doesn’t have to know.)

Ryujin goes in front of the mirror, plugs her earbuds in her phone, and dances in the darkness of the room. It feels strangely intimate with Yeji sleeping in the corner.

She dances better than she did during their monthly evaluation.

**::**

Seeing Yeji wake up is a whole new level of _adorable_.

Ryujin’s been dancing for the past hour, feeling her ears ache from wearing the earbuds for so long while jostling around, and the moment she reaches for a cup of water, Yeji starts stirring.

First, she starts with taking a large breath through her nose like she just dived in the water and came up for air. Next, she stretches her limbs—her arms forward and then her legs— _like a cat_ , Ryujin thinks. Then, her eyes.

(The first time Ryujin saw them, it was grainy and pixelated, the resolution stretched against the screen of her phone. In person, it’s even better; how it disappears when she’s happy, how it’s a little puffy when she greets _good morning_ , how they always find Ryujin’s even if they’re on different sides of the room.)

Her _eyes_.

Yeji rubs them with closed fists—again, like a damn cat—and blinks blearily, lifting her head and catching Ryujin staring. And then there’s this… _honest_ and open smile that tugs on her lips, head falling back against the couch cushions like she didn’t just take Ryujin’s breath away.

“Good morning,” her voice is deeper than usual and Ryujin rolls her eyes as she hands the older girl a cup of water. Yeji laughs. “I fell asleep early last night then slept in today. I thought I was running late and my phone died on the way here.”

She picks at Ryujin’s jacket, trapping the fabric of the collar between her thumb and forefinger.

“Looks like no one’s coming in today.” Yeji sits up and Ryujin takes a seat beside her, cushion still warm.

Ryujin can feel the other girl’s stare at the side of her face. A smile pulls at her lips and feels a finger poke at a cheek.

Yeji whispers in the space between them. “Practice then let’s go somewhere? My treat.”

**::**

They end up walking the backstreets a few hours later, looking for somewhere to eat and avoiding crowded areas, huddled together with their shoulders brushing and whispered laughter.

Yeji follows the scent of a gopchang restaurant, practically bouncing at the heels of her feet when she pulls at Ryujin and telling her _did you know that Hwasa-sunbaenim and I are from Jeonju?_

Ryujin _did_ know that even knows which train Yeji takes in the morning because Ryujin makes sure to have their morning coffee a few minutes just before the older girl arrives to be certain that it’s still hot.

She just shrugs, trying to be nonchalant about it. “Really? That’s cool.”

Yeji nods enthusiastically, tugging at Ryujin’s sleeve and to a corner table. Ryujin swears inside her head, clenching her hands inside her pocket to prevent her from doing something stupid like holding Yeji’s hand.

Even if it’s just the short distance from the entrance to their table.

_God._

**::**

Yeji was called outside of the practice room during break time, dropping her phone in Ryujin’s lap. The movement jostles the phone, screen lighting up and Ryujin had to stifle her laugh because _of course,_ Yeji’s lock screen is of her dog.

She can’t see Yeji through the glass on the door so she whips out her own phone.

**_Ryujin JYP [3:54 PM]_ **

_:)_

_Huh,_ Ryujin thought, staring at the message notification on Yeji’s screen.

Yeji comes back a few minutes later, raising an eyebrow at Ryujin’s furrowed ones.

“Is something wrong?” She gingerly sits back down on the couch, feeling herself start to crack when Ryujin’s stare won’t leave her alone. She holds in her laughter.

“I was thinking of nicknames.”

“Nicknames?” Yeji repeats, Ryujin just nods. “For who? For us?”

Ryujin waves Yeji’s phone, the older girl catches the new message notification. “I don’t want to be called _Ryujin JYP_ on your phone. It sounds so formal. And it’s been what, a few months?”

Yeji looks around, other trainees are resting, but she feels unsettled. The clock tells her that they still have twenty more minutes before training picks up again. She cocks her head towards the door.

“Sorry,” she breathes out when they’re in an empty corner, sliding down the wall and waits for the younger girl to sit beside her. _It feels weird to come up with a nickname for you with so many people around. I want it to just be ours. I want to have you alone. I want it to just be us—_

There’s something in Ryujin’s eyes that tells Yeji that she _knows_.

_Can you read my mind?_

Ryujin shakes her head and Yeji feels her eyes widen. _Okay, if she shook her head it means that she_ can _read my mind, right?_

A flick to her forehead brings her back, rubbing at the spot and pouting at Ryujin’s amused expression.

“You have your _I’m thinking of something ridiculous_ face.”

Yeji rolls her eyes, feeling the heat of another body pressed up against her side. “So. Nicknames.”

Ryujin hums, both staring at the floor in front of them while Yeji traces the pattern on Ryujin’s joggers, a straight line on the side of her thigh that cuts into a slant by the—

Yeji watches as her hand gets swooped up and into Ryujin’s, feels a soft palm brushing against hers and _god_ , were her hands always this sensitive?

She can feel every point where they meet, feels the way every dip of Ryujin’s palm shapes against hers; is aware of the rapid pulse pressing against hers, and how _alive_ it is.

She’s held hands with her sister, parents, and _friends_ before. But not like this. Doesn’t understand what _makes_ holding Ryujin’s hand different from all the other times; and also, can’t quite lump Ryujin with just a friend.

Yeji moves, slips her fingers in between Ryujin’s, and _wow_.

Ryujin has her cheek against a propped-up knee, head turned in Yeji’s direction, and holding the older girl’s stare even though a pretty blush is forming at the highs of her cheekbones.

“Okay?” she asks, quietly. Yeji nods. “So, nicknames?”

**::**

**_Ryuddaeng [10:00 PM]_ **

_*Ryuddaeng has set a reminder*_

_*Ryuddaeng set reminder time to 7:30 AM*_

_*Ryuddaeng changed reminder name to BREAKFAST*_

_Good?_

**_Yeddeong [10:02 PM]_ **

_Yup :)_

**::**

The days blur together. The dances are getting harder, everything is getting stricter, and Ryujin tries not to think too much about the one less bag in the corner where everyone piles their things during practice; tries not to think too much about another person leaving the group chat.

Ryujin blinks, catching Yeji’s eyes from where the older girl’s tying her shoes in the middle of the room.

_What?_

Yeji shrugs.

A staff is at the door, holding it open and looking down at his phone, looking up when he senses that no one was following him.

“Come on, now, best to hurry along.”

There are five of them. Ryujin, Yeji, Chaeryoung, Jisoo, and Yuna. Her heart hammers inside her chest, hope blossoming like a spark catching on a piece of a newspaper when starting a fire.

She couldn’t help it, reaching forward and skimming the tips of her fingers against the inside of Yeji’s wrist. Yeji slows down, lets the other three girls move past them, looking back at Ryujin before she opens her fingers and they’re holding hands.

The spark inside her chest blossoms, simmers into a cool blue, steady like Yeji’s grip.

She feels Yeji’s grip tighten, the words _get along, you five, you’re the next group_ bouncing around the room, and Ryujin doesn’t know why but it’s like she took off her shades and everything after that looks so _real_.

It was Yeji who led them out of the room, who said _you guys go ahead, we’ll catch up_ to the other three, who tugged Ryujin to a corner in the hallway and _hugs_ her.

Yeji’s hands slipped away from her, wrapping around Ryujin’s waist slowly, one palm landing in between Ryujin’s shoulder blades, and her chin hooked on Ryujin’s shoulder.

Yeji hugs just as consuming as her smile.

Yeji hugs just like how every planet spin around the sun.

Yeji—

“It’s real,” is whispered against the fabric of her shirt. “, it’s so close now and it’s real.”

A laugh fights its way out of Ryujin’s lungs. “Oh my god, you’re so clingy that the universe decided to put us in a group.”

With Yeji pressed so close against her, Ryujin can _feel_ her laughter more than hear it. And it’s _so_ much better. “I’m not clingy,” if Ryujin looks now, Yeji will have her tongue in between her teeth, smug. “, I just meet you halfway.”

Ryujin melts.

**::**

Smart.

Noun. Means intelligence; acumen.

Smart.

Adjective. Means having or showing a quick-witted intelligence.

Ryujin is a smart girl.

And she knows herself.

Knows the limits of her body when she starts dancing way too hard, knows when she needs to take a breather instead of using up the last minutes of their break time to nail a move down, knows when things are serious, knows how to act, and think in certain situations.

Debuting is so close she can taste it on her tongue. Ever since the meeting, the five of them have been moved from their old practice room to a new one, throat straining from hours of vocal sessions, and multiple blisters on their toes from longer hours on heels.

Yuna, their youngest who always seems to be bouncing off of the wall with excess energy, seems depleted lately, only managing a tired smile up at her when Ryujin pats her head on her way out to the bathroom.

Chaeryoung looks more haggard than usual, hunched over her phone with Jisoo who recorded their dance practice, looking for imperfections.

And Yeji—

Ryujin’s a smart girl.

This is her job, her workplace; needs this career to help her family and to pay off the debt to the company and there are so many things that could go wrong, so many things that she already thought of—

_So why why why_ why _the hell do I want to kiss Yeji so badly?_

Ever since they moved from hand holding to Yeji being the one to initiate melt-worthy hugs, Ryujin feels herself craving for _more_. And wondering.

Like, her skin prickles in the best way whenever she starts to hold hands with Yeji, and _is it possible to feel that on my lips? What would it feel if we kissed? Is it just a Hwang Yeji-thing?_

Ryujin hopes it is.

She splashes cold water on her face.

_Focus._

**::**

Yeji tells her parents that she’s coming home late, watching as Seoul’s nightlife comes alive in front of her eyes.

“Yeji-unnie, where do you want to eat?” It’s Yuna, walking backward with Chaeryoung holding her by the shoulder, making sure the doesn’t bump into anyone. Jisoo’s at her other side, stopping to take pictures now and then.

Yeji just shrugs. “I was thinking of the place you showed me the other day? You guys wanted to try it too, right?”

Yuna nods rapidly, eyes wide with childlike wonder. She reminds Yeji of her puppy.

An elbow digs into her side, dulled by the thickness of Yeji’s hoodie. Ryujin juts her chin at Yuna’s direction.

“Yuna’s such an alpha, it’s cute.”

Yeji blinks at the younger girl. Secondary genders aren’t brought up often, only if it’s in the context of finding a mate or—if you’re _really_ traditional—when finding jobs. The entertainment industry is still learning but it’s more progressive than it’s been a couple of decades ago.

The most obvious way of telling what a person’s secondary gender is through their scent and even after presenting—before their scents fully develop—, everyone is required to get suppressant implants that dull their scents, only allowed to take it off when they’re at the right age or if they’re mated.

Ryujin shakes her head.

“The way she acts around you, it’s obvious.” When Yeji just continues to stare bewildered at her, Ryujin squeezes her hand like she’s saying _focus_. “You’re the older alpha, she’s younger. Obviously, she’ll want attention and your approval.”

She turns her head to the front, watching Yuna. Now that Yeji thinks about it, she’s sure Jisoo’s an omega. Chaeryoung could be a beta, but she’s not too sure about that one. She looks back at Ryujin, wonders if anything will change between them if she pieced together—

“I’m an omega,” is all Ryujin says, thumb smoothing over Yeji’s.

Nothing changes.

**::**

Nothing changes.

Everyone was relying on her even before she got the official title as ITZY’s— _they already have a group name!—_ leader, being the eldest in their little group, and Ryujin still feels like the first person she runs to went things get a bit too tough.

Nothing changes.

Training is still rough. The hours stretching and feels like it’s not enough with practicing poses, vocal lessons, learning dances, facial expressions; rinse and repeat multiple times a day. Ryujin is still the one who always hands everyone a new band-aid for a new blister.

Nothing changes.

She still looks at Ryujin even when the younger girl is too busy doing something else, still meets Ryujin’s wandering hands halfway to hold them, still tries to envelop the younger girl in a tight hug in the safety of the night, hoping that if she hugs Ryujin tight enough, she can bring a little piece of the other girl home with her to last her through the night.

Nothing changes.

But she does discover something new as the days go by.

Like how it’s getting harder and harder not to tug their hands inside her pocket, like how many of Ryujin’s eyelashes she can count from leaning close before the younger girl pushes her away with a fond roll of her eyes, like how she starts catching herself not only looking at Ryujin’s eyes but also at her lips.

It’s always right there; in a stern line when she’s making her muscles remember a dance move, stretched in a smirk when she catches Yeji staring, a little bit white when Ryujin sinks her teeth into it as they’re pulling away from a hug, always—

“You okay?” It’s right there, in front of her, a little bit wet from the water Ryujin just downed.

Yeji clears her throat and her mind. “Perfect.”

Nothing changes.

This is how Yeji has always felt, just growing.

**::**

**_Yeddeong [11:01 PM]_ **

_I saw the news!_

_Congratulations, you’re going to do great!_

**_Yeddeong [11:34 PM]_ **

_Asleep?_

**_Yeddeong [01:21 AM]_ **

_Goodnight (:_

**::**

For the first time in over a year, Yeji arrives earlier than Ryujin.

The last bit of sleep that clings to her goes away as she sits in the lobby where Ryujin always waits for her, the security guard nodding at her once and asking _waiting for your friend? No, she hasn’t come in yet_.

She waits, looks up as Ryujin bursts through the door ten minutes later, catching her breath and with bags under her eyes. Yeji’s on her feet within a second.

“Hey,” she whispers, taking the younger girl’s bag off of her shoulders, letting Ryujin slump against her as they awkwardly shuffle along the lobby and into an empty elevator. “, didn’t get enough sleep?”

Ryujin just hums, eyes closing as she settles more into Yeji’s side.

(They didn’t have time to get coffee that morning and Yeji keeps on yawning all throughout the early hours that their instructor snaps at her.)

Yeji supposes it was bound to happen. Ryujin getting exposure means they’re getting closer to their debut, lets the public and other companies aware that something is cooking in JYPE, means that it’s good for ITZY.

But Yeji feels _weird_ about it all.

Feels weird as she texts Ryujin before an episode of _Mix Nine_ airs to tell her that she’s watching. Feels weird when she sees others getting closer to Ryujin. Feels weird when she realizes that for all the closeness that they have, Yeji only has her during the weekends.

The weird feeling sits in her chest.

She doesn’t like it.

**::**

For some reason, Yeji doesn’t want to ask Ryujin.

She stares at the menu, hoping that the flavors will make sense if she glares at it hard enough. She sighs, wonders how Ryujin did it for a whole year—bringing the both of them coffee, is what Yeji meant—and all without asking Yeji for her preference yet _somehow_ knowing.

When the barista starts to send her worried glances, Yeji gives up and orders two of the flavor she likes.

And then, she makes the mistake of arriving _way_ too early, their drinks already lukewarm by the time Ryujin arrives.

“It’s okay,” the younger girl assures her on their way to the elevator when Yeji won’t look at her. She takes a sip. “It’s not that bad.”

Yeji totally caught her wince. She sighs. “It’s not coffee, isn’t it?” She asks, watching Ryujin’s reflection through the closed elevator doors where Yeji pressed her forehead against the moment it closes. “The drink you order every morning, it’s not coffee?”

Ryujin bites her lip, hesitating.

“It’s hot chocolate. I don’t really like coffee that much.”

The weird feeling presses against the inside of her chest. Yeji bites the inside of her cheek and keeps her head down the whole morning.

_How did I not know that?_

**::**

**_Yeddeong [7:43 AM]_ **

_Where are you?_

She has no choice but to come up to the practice room when it’s nearing 8 AM and there’s still no sign of Ryujin. Yeji checks her phone again, still no reply.

Jisoo greets her first. “Still asleep?” she asks, looking amused when Yeji jumps back in surprise. “No coffee today, I see.”

Ryujin comes in at sporadic times so Yeji always asks her if she’s near before she orders their drinks. But Ryujin hasn’t texted her.

So.

Yuna asks her if she wants her to get her coffee, Yeji waves her off and tells the maknae thank you anyway.

“Have you guys seen Ryujin?”

Jisoo and Yuna turned their heads to Chaeryoung. Yeji feels bad when the younger girl squeaks at the sudden attention.

“She texted last night that something came up with Mix Nine’s filming and she won’t be here today.” And as an afterthought, Chaeryoung adds: “I thought she told you, unnie.” The look on her face is enough for Yeji to know that she didn’t mean to say that out loud.

“No, she didn’t tell me.” Everyone was silent, startling when Yeji claps her hands twice, loudly. “Okay, let’s start warming up.”

The day goes on and the weird feeling grows when she looks around and remembers that Ryujin isn’t around.

**::**

”Really? That’s the prize?”

“I know, right?”

“Debuting as YG’s next group, Ryujin-ssi’s— _wow_.”

“What’ll happen to ITZY, then?”

“Debut as four, maybe. The hell if I know.”

Yeji walks away, hates that she stayed to eavesdrop.

**::**

“Maybe you’re jealous,” is what Hyunjin supplies over the loud sound of the ball colliding with his bat. Lately, Yeji has been feeling restless; can still remember the weird look on Ryujin’s face when Yeji hugged her for no reason during their last practice.

She tries to keep her distance but it’s hard when the other girl is _right there_ and not elsewhere that Yeji isn’t.

(She wonders when did she start feeling like every minute with the other girl is limited.)

_Jealous_. Yeji doesn’t think she is? But, well, maybe—

“Yeah, maybe you’re jealous ‘cause she might debut under YG? Is that your dream company, then? I can’t say I blame you—”

Every word from the boy’s mouth draws even more confusion and she had to physically stop Hyunjin from talking any further because _what?_

“I’m not jealous of that,” she blurts out, drops her bat, and lets the baseball crash on the net behind her. Hyunjin stops swinging too.

They sit down at the bench outside of the batting cages, Hyunjin tossing a coin in the air as he decides which drink to buy from the vending machine.

“Okay, so, you’re not jealous of her being on Mix Nine,” he drags the last word before turning his cat-like eyes to Yeji, the smirk on his face so familiar. God, they really _do_ look alike. “You could be jealous of the people around her. You’re a weekend trainee and she’s here almost every day. And you also said that ever since she got into Mix Nine, she stopped texting you ‘cause she’s busy.”

Hyunjin shakes his head at the bewildered expression on Yeji’s face. He chooses coke. And because he’s feeling generous and maybe a little bit happy from helping his twin with the realization, he buys Yeji a drink, too.

“I don’t think it’s just jealousy,” he tells her when their time in the cage is up. “I think you also miss her. A whole fuckin’ lot if it’s got you this messed up.”

Yeji punches his shoulder. Both as a thank you and for the curse word.

**::**

“I guess I do miss her,” Yeji whispers against the darkness of her bedroom ceiling. It’s nice to put a name on what she’s feeling but…

The weird feeling on her chest persists.

**::**

Ryujin can practically _feel_ Yeji’s restlessness.

Mix Nine just finished and Ryujin suddenly has so much free time; didn’t realize how much she was investing in the show until she saw Yeji’s surprised face when she waits in the lobby with a cup of coffee like she used to.

They’re at Jisoo’s parent’s house, enjoying their day off, and also following through with Yuna’s _we should bond more outside of training_ request. No one can say no to her. Ryujin’s still building up her tolerance but seriously, they landed the cutest maknae ever. Even if Yuna’s taller than her.

That kid’s a giant, she swears.

Some drama is playing on the huge screen, Chaeryeong’s legs are draped over Ryujin’s lap and she pushes it gently, stretching her own legs on the carpet when she starts feeling pins and needles tickling her skin.

A pinky intertwines with hers, tugging until she turns her attention to her other side.

“You okay? Need anything?” comes from her left. It’s Yeji, brow furrowed and _so close_. The alpha’s nose seems even more pointed under the television light. Ryujin wants to bite it.

“Just stretching, legs fell asleep.”

Yeji nods. Doesn’t let go of Ryujin’s pinky and continues watching the drama.

So—

_Yeji’s being weird._

No, not with the touches; it’s a staple for them at this time after knowing each other for a year. But more like…, she’s clingier than usual.

Ryujin doesn’t know _why_.

The episode ends and Jisoo calls for a break, making a bunch of calls for which food they wanted. Chaeryoung pokes at Ryujin’s bicep and it’s only then that she realizes that she’s been spacing out, a finger twirling a strand of Yeji’s hair absentmindedly and the alpha is now fully leaning back against the couch with her eyes closed.

“Do you mind waiting for the food?” Chaeryoung whispers, gesturing to Yuna’s head that plopped down her lap as soon as Ryujin moved her legs. “I can’t move at the moment.”

Ryujin nods, careful not to jostle Jisoo’s ridiculously soft couch, and waits by the kitchen. Yeji lazily opens her eyes and no one even bats an eyelash when she slipped out of the room after Ryujin.

“Hey,” Ryujin whispers, watching as Yeji leans against the counter beside her, a little crinkle between the alpha’s eyebrows that she wants to smooth over. Either with her finger or a kiss, Ryujin still can’t decide which. “, want some water?” Is what she asks instead.

The older girl just looks at her, eyes wandering from every point of Ryujin’s face. She looks troubled, biting her lips like she’s hesitating and—

“I missed you.”

Ryujin wonders if there’s something in the water she just drank or…or maybe in the warm glow of Jisoo’s kitchen because she _swears,_ she had to physically restrain herself from reaching forward and following her _want_ to finally kiss Yeji.

She can count the individual lashes kissing Yeji’s cheekbones as the older girl avoids looking at her, fingers twisting until Ryujin reaches forward, marveling at the way the warmth running from the tips of her fingers to her stomach doesn’t stop no matter how many times they held hands.

Yeji drops her forehead against Ryujin’s shoulder, watching the swinging of their hands in between them, humming when a hand slides against the back of her head and plays with her hair.

“Me too.”

**::**

There it is.

Yeji feels herself relax, can’t even apologize if she’s leaning too hard on Ryujin because—

_She misses me too._

Her smile feels too big on her face, too warm. So, she smothers her face against Ryujin’s shoulder and feels a press of a smile against the side of her head.

She then realizes that the weird feeling is desperation.

The longing to know if Ryujin feels the same.

Yeji soars.

**::**

She doesn’t even flinch when a cold bottle is pressed against her sweaty cheek, blinking one eye open as she takes the water with an appreciative croak. Ryujin looks down at her with a smirk before continuing her mission of handing cold water to all members.

Yeji takes a swig, looking around the mess around them. Towering boxes are everywhere, including unassembled furniture and their mismatched suitcases. The AC just got turned on as Ryujin and Chaeryoung lug in the last two boxes, with the other three already splayed on different surfaces and ready to pass out.

That was just two minutes ago.

Yuna finishes her third lap around the dorm smiling widely and Yeji can’t understand how she’s already recharged even though she was the first one to whine pathetically in the bare living room that she’s too tired to move.

“Okay,” Chaeryoung chimes in, looking like she didn’t spend the hour lifting heavy boxes to the second floor. Yeji’s just a _little_ bit scared of the younger girl. “, there are three rooms, two the same size and one’s smaller. Everyone still on board with using the ladder game?”

“No one can cheat in the ladder game,” Jisoo agrees, wiping down Ryujin’s sweaty back. Yeji snickers and the younger omega shoots her a dirty look.

“I’ll get a pen and paper.”

Yeji draws the lines, goes along with Yuna’s _not enough lines_. Ryujin and Chaeryoung provide the background music while dancing in their seats and Jisoo looks for something to put under one of the coffee table’s legs because she’s _sure_ it’s short on one leg.

Yeji’s not hoping but it’d be cool if—

Ryujin catches her eyes, the younger girl mouthing _hi roomie_.

Jisoo and Yuna end up rooming together, already bringing up Pinterest as they visualize their room then both Ryujin and Yeji leave Chaeryoung alone as she begins sobbing against their brand-new couch, happy that she got her room.

“You think she’ll be okay?” Yeji stumbles as her suitcase snags at a corner, smiles sheepishly at Ryujin who looks back at her.

“I’ll check on her later.”

The room is alright. A standard bunk bed is pushed against one corner, two closets at the other, and two desks in front of that, plus their own bathroom adjacent to the door.

Yeji feels too aware of the space between them, how they had to leave their suitcases in the hallway to further scope the room out. She can smell Ryujin’s perfume in this proximity; something wintery, she said something about liking the Christmas season before. Yeji looks at the bunk bed, feeling herself spacing out because _oh my god, they’re roommates_.

“Top or bottom?”

Ryujin closes the door behind her, Yeji letting out an embarrassing sound as she hit her hip against a desk corner, feeling the flush rising in her cheeks as she takes in the younger girl’s confident stance and _oh my god, she really wants me to answer that?!_

This is the part where Yeji should blame Hyunjin. He’s the one who got tired with Yeji not catching on to every one of his dirty jokes so he sat her down and explained.

A lot.

“ _What?_ ” Her voice sounds too high, taking another step back as Ryujin takes a step away from the door.

The omega raises an amused eyebrow, smiling. “What? Top bunk or the bottom one?”

Yeji’s too busy pressing herself against the closet door, wishing it swallows her. Maybe Aslan will take pity on her and throw her into Narnia because it’ll be _so_ much better than watching the realization dawn on Ryujin’s face in real-time.

She tries to do damage control.

“I—”

_“Oh my god?!”_

She’s too late.

Yeji sinks to the floor with her back against the closet door, rapping her knuckles desperately. _If I knock, maybe Narnia will open._

It was Yuna who peeks her head inside their room instead, glancing curiously between Ryujin whose eyes are wide open, and Yeji muttering under her breath at the other side of the room.

“Uhm, we’re still getting pizza for dinner, right?”

Pizza. Right. Yeji could cry right now, wonders if Chaeryoung’s done with the couch so she can have a turn.

Yuna shakes her head, disappearing in the hallway without closing the door so Yeji straightens out her clothes, crosses the room, and tries to will her blush away. She nudges her foot against Ryujin’s socked one, taking a deep breath.

“Top,” she clears her throat, looks anywhere else but at Ryujin’s eyes. “, that’s where I’m most comfortable.”

**::**

Ryujin drops against the bare mattress of the bottom bunk as Yeji closes the door behind her.

_Why does it feel like she’s talking about something else entirely? Or maybe both?!_

She punches the bed. She did _not_ need to think about Yeji like that.

**::**

Living together is an adjustment and they build up a routine of some sort.

On their first night together, both of them played rock-paper-scissors to decide who gets to shower first. Ryujin won and she smiles so childishly that Yeji forgot that she lost.

Yeji wipes her mouth, careful not to drip her wet hair all over her pajamas, and wipes down the fogged-up mirror. She takes the blow dryer with her, closing the lights to their little bathroom. Once the vents quiet down, the sound of Yuna and Chaeryoung playing video games in the living room reminds her that they have pretty thin walls.

Or maybe the kids are just that loud.

Yeji has to keep an eye out for their neighbors.

The only light inside their room is from Ryujin’s desk, the younger girl doing her homework, looking up when Yeji comes out of the bathroom.

Ryujin rolls her chair away from the desk with a brush on hand, Yeji wrapping the towel more securely around her shoulders as she goes to sit on the floor in between Ryujin’s legs. The dryer’s always loud whenever they do this so they don’t bother striking up a conversation.

Ryujin runs the brush through Yeji’s hair, careful with every knot, and Yeji feels the day catching up at her, sagging against Ryujin’s legs as her eyelids drop.

Yeji feels homesick from time to time but with new obligations thrust on her now that she graduated high school and preparing for ITZY’s looming debut, it keeps her busy enough. Maybe a little bit stressed, too, but that gets washed away by this time of night.

The dryer is turned off, leaving a dull ringing bouncing inside Yeji’s skull, and she rests a cheek on Ryujin’s knee, not moving as the omega continues brushing her hair.

She doesn’t know how much time passed when she jolts, muscles spasming violently.

Ryujin shushes her, softly running her nails along Yeji’s scalp. “I think you dozed off but it was just for a few minutes, don’t worry.”

It takes a lot of effort to haul herself up on her feet and clean up, going through the motions with half of her eyes closed. Ryujin rolls her chair back to where she was when Yeji came out of the shower, already resuming her homework again but keeping an eye on Yeji this time.

“Thanks,” Yeji mutters, stopping beside Ryujin to pull the younger girl in a hug, feeling Ryujin’s huff of amusement against her stomach. “Don’t stay up too late.”

“Homework,” is all Ryujin mutters lowly, gripping the back of Yeji’s sleep shirt. “Good night, Yeddeong.”

“Night night.”

**::**

Ryujin keeps a list inside her mind.

_Yeji sings in the shower._

She sings the tracks they’re still recording, hums it when she’s brushing her teeth, and Ryujin can feel her mouthing it whenever Yeji rests her cheek on her knee when she dries the alpha’s hair.

_Yeji snores._

She apologized when Ryujin pointed it out the next morning. It was cute, though. Kind of like a little reminder that Yeji’s just at the bunk on top of hers instead of being two and a half hours away now.

_Yeji likes it when Ryujin comes out of the shower wearing a pajama set._

She always bets what the night’s pattern will be, traps the fabric between her thumb, and pouts when she guesses wrong. When Yeji guesses right, though, Ryujin likes the way the alpha ducks her head when Ryujin congratulates her.

_Yeji doesn’t like waking up early but she’s never late._

She always whines and rolls to the other side of the bed, away from Ryujin’s reach. But she always gets up the second time Ryujin wakes her up, sitting in the middle of her bunk with blankets wrapped around her, taking her sweet time in opening her eyes. Regardless of how slow she is at waking up, Yeji’s always the first one out of the door, hurrying the members along with her.

_Yeji can’t sleep if someone’s out late_

She usually keeps herself busy in the living room. Checking up on their stock, phone always on the loudest volume in case someone calls. Ryujin stays up with her most nights, leaving a blanket at the back of the couch just in case. And they fall asleep together way too many times on accident, only waking up when a member comes home and wakes them up.

_Yeji sleeps on her stomach._

She’s got an arm under and around the pillow she’s resting on, one leg sticking out. It’s something Ryujin discovered just before she’s going to bed and Yeji’s already in deep sleep. When she’s waking the older girl the next morning, she’s still in the same position. It’s endearing.

It’s still a growing list and Ryujin wants to learn more.

**::**

It’s been a few months since they started living together. They’re grocery shopping when Ryujin asks the question.

“Why me?”

Ryujin is busy looking at the shelf in front of her, comparing the expiry dates of different loaves. “The members always request dishes for me to cook, but you never do. So,” she ends up putting both in the cart, their manager trudging along the aisle to the next item on their list. “, what do you want me to cook for you?”

“Pancakes,” is the first thing out of Yeji’s mouth, remembering how her dad always makes them pancakes during Sundays when she and her sister were younger.

“Pancakes?” Ryujin parrots, an amused smile blooming on her lips, and Yeji can’t understand how she’s so beautiful even with bags under her eyes and under the unflattering lights of the supermarket. Maybe it’s a Ryujin thing.

Yeji nods. “With little chocolate chips arranged like a smiley face.”

Ryujin throws her head back to bark a laugh and Yeji wants to kiss her whisker-like dimples. “You’re pushing your luck.”

Yeji just shrugs, happy. She’ll take whatever Ryujin’s willing to give.

**::**

Jisoo went to visit her parents, Chaeryoung is over at IZ*ONE’s dorm since last night, and Yeji managed to bribe Yuna with a box of chocolate and video games just to not go outside of her room until they’re done with the kitchen.

She told Ryujin to wake her up before she started cooking, doesn’t want to miss a moment even if it’s just Ryujin opening a bunch of flour and mixing them in a bowl.

There’s soft R&B playing from the living room speakers when Yeji comes outside of their bedroom and she’s in the middle of a jaw-splitting yawn when Ryujin peeks her head outside of the kitchen, still in the process of pulling her hair up.

“Last chance for breakfast in bed.”

Yeji shakes her head, motioning for the younger girl to turn around as she fumbles half asleep with the ties of Ryujin’s apron.

“I’m good, thanks.” She wraps her hands around the mug of coffee in the breakfast island and Yeji hums appreciatively, blowing on the surface carefully.

They’re quiet for the most part, Yeji feeling her body waking up more as Ryujin goes from mixing the batter in front of her to putting chocolate chips in the shape Yeji requested. It’s simple yet it fills Yeji with _warmth_.

Maybe it’s the coffee. Or the soft sunlight coming in from the window at the side of the kitchen.

But Yeji can feel it on her face, burning brighter when Ryujin spins around after she put the lid on the pan and catches her eyes.

It feels a lot like how songs talk about what it feels to like someone.

**::**

It’s a small portion, just enough for the two of them. So, it doesn’t take too much time for Ryujin to finish cooking, shaking her head softly at the melted chocolate on Yeji’s pancakes. It’s cute.

Yeji’s already looking at her when she drops their plates in front of the alpha, the soft smile on her face making Yeji look much younger.

And happier.

Ryujin looks away because there’s no way she can stop herself from kissing Yeji if she keeps looking at her like that.

So, she asks: “Why are you making that face?”

They’re eating on the countertop instead of the dining table. Mostly because Ryujin’s legs feel like they’re getting pulled to Yeji’s center of gravity. She holds on to the fork, instead.

“What face?” Yeji tilts her head to one side. _Fuck_ , Ryujin bites her lip to stop herself from cooing.

“I don’t know, like,” she flails her arms, instead, gesturing to Yeji’s general direction. Yeji laughs. Ryujin changes the subject, already feeling an unwilling blush rise on her face. “Do you like it?”

Yeji, bless her soul, goes along with Ryujin.

“Yeah,” she takes another mouthful, looking directly at Ryujin’s eyes. “, you’ll be a nice girlfriend to bring home to someone’s parents.”

Wait.

_What?_

Ryujin straightens her back. _Is she telling me to like someone else?_

**::**

_Oh my god, why did I say that?_ Yeji freaks out inside her mind. _Now she’ll know. Now she’ll realize I like her. Now she’ll—_

“Wait—hey,” Yeji sputters, brain catching up as she watches Ryujin’s face morphs from flustered into frustration in a matter of seconds.

“I’ll go find someone and meet their parents, then.” She’s pouting, the crinkle in her brow deep, and Yeji can’t comprehend because _wait, that’s not what I meant._

She rounds the island, careful not to make any sudden movements. Yeji traces the inside of Ryujin’s wrist—their little signal when someone wants to start holding hands—flinching when Ryujin glares at her but lets their fingers intertwine anyway.

_“What?”_ the omega bites out.

Yeji whines, turns Ryujin carefully until they’re face to face.

“I meant to introduce you to my parents,” she explains, squeezing Ryujin’s hand once, twice. “, not someone else’s.”

Yeji wonders if she should apologize for giving the younger girl too many whiplashes in such a short period.

Ryujin takes a step back, surprised. “You can’t—you don’t just— _what?”_

They’re close now, Yeji doesn’t even realize that Ryujin’s back is pressed against the kitchen island and that they’re toe to toe. What’s one more surprise, right?

Yeji drops a kiss on Ryujin’s cheek.

Ryujin pushes her away.

**::**

There’s a certain satisfaction when Ryujin watches Yeji’s face crumble when she pushed the alpha away, a little evil payback for all that’s happened.

But Ryujin also bunches her fist in the fabric where she pushed Yeji backward, pulling until the older girl’s back in her space and—

Ryujin kisses Yeji.

**::**

end.

**::**

there will be a sequel to this, dw

i just wanted to explore a universe of how itzy formed irl but with an abo twist lmao

also, who doesn’t like the friends-to-lover trope, amirite?

and WOW this was a monolith to write

i cant even start with how much i enjoyed writing this lmao

so thanku to the friend for this uwu

follow me on twitter **rexwrites** for idk?

thank you and have a good one!


	2. :: chapter ii ::

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lil note: this chapter has smut :) 

**::**

chapter ii

**::**

They’re suspended at the moment, in each other’s space, so _close_ that Yeji’s stuttering breath tickles Ryujin’s lips.

Ryujin licks her lips once, just a flicker of her tongue over and her eyes flutter when she tastes the chapstick Yeji puts on her lips before bed; something strawberry flavored and bursting on her tongue, shocking and not enough.

It was chaste, just a peck, and yet Ryujin doesn’t know what to do first: to kiss Yeji again (and again and _again_ ) or to trap that quivering bottom lip against hers, to suck the flavor off and see if there’s anywhere else inside the alpha’s mouth that has the same taste.

It’s this haunting _want_ , all-consuming and shifting the ground beneath her feet until she sways backward infinitesimally, bumping right against the hand Yeji braced on the counter behind her. Yeji follows, pressed intimately against her, crowding, like she can’t accept being apart from Ryujin even for a bit.

And neither of them is making a move to kiss again.

The clock ticks loudly from the living room, the song changes. They’re still holding hands, Ryujin’s left gripped by Yeji’s right. She slides her hand away, fingertips brushing at the inside of Yeji’s wrist.

_Thump-ump thump_.

Yeji’s eyes are serious, knows that Ryujin is getting a feel of her rapid heartbeat.

“Is this,” Yeji starts leaning in, the tip of her nose already bumping against Ryujin’s, enthralled with the way the omega’s breath hitches. “, can I kiss you?”

“Yeah,” she’s breathless, weak in the knees, feels her body tingling with every point of contact.

A hand ghost at the back of Ryujin’s shirt, mind slow as Yeji’s hand cradles the back of her head, tilting her at an angle and— 

They’re kissing again, firmer this time. Their lips chase each other in a push and pull, soft and sticky from both the maple syrup and Yeji’s chapstick. Ryujin tightens her grip against the hand holding hers, back arching backward and feeling the heat of the body pressed against her bow forward, following.

The hand against the base of her skull squeezes, a little warning before Yeji moves her face for a better angle and Ryujin takes the chance to swipe her tongue out, taking a soft lip in between hers, and _sucks_.

“ _Mmph_ ,” a groan rumbles Yeji’s chest, the feel of it vibrating Ryujin’s bones and echoes inside of her, liquid heat pooling at the bottom of her stomach. The sound almost pulls a sympathetic moan from her. A whine slips out instead, startling Ryujin enough to think _yeah, we should stop_.

Ryujin fists a hand against the center of Yeji’s sleep shirt, warm from being trapped in between them, and starts pushing at the alpha’s chest.

Yeji looks lost, eyes glazed so bad that all she can see is the wetness of Ryujin’s lips, breathing raggedly, lips a little swollen and a whole lot slick. She furrows her brows at the distance, one hand hanging in between them from where she was holding Ryujin’s head, doesn't know what to do with it.

“We should,” Ryujin’s voice is rough, enticing enough that Yeji takes a half-step forward before Ryujin’s hand on her shirt pushes her back again. “, we should finish eating.”

It’s the last thing she wants to do right now, wants to see what other noises she can pull from the older girl but— 

A door opens far down the hallway.

“Unnie?” Yuna’s voice rings out, and Ryujin can already hear her pout. “I’ll let you have half of the chocolate but I’m really hungry.”

“Chocolate?” She mouths, raising an eyebrow to Yeji who looks like she got doused by cold water.

“I, uh, may have bribed her to keep out of the kitchen this morning.”

Ryujin shakes her head, wants to drop a kiss on one of Yeji’s red cheeks but reigns in the urge. She settles on thumbing at Yeji’s bottom lip instead. It’s an infinitely worse choice when Yeji’s eyes darken further. Ryujin clears her throat. “Come out here, I’ll fix you something.”

Yuna’s got her shoulders hunched, an apologetic smile on her face when she looks at Yeji, perking up at the sight of pancakes. “You going to finish those?” She juts her chin towards their half-eaten plates and with how far-gone Yeji seems to be, Ryujin watches the older alpha’s jaw muscle twitching, holding in a growl.

She subtly pinches Yeji’s back. _Behave_.

“Yeah, sorry, I only made enough for us two and we’re starving. I’ll make you eggs, though. Anything you want?”

Yuna’s unaware of the leader’s tenseness and Yeji has the decency to shoot Ryujin a sheepish pull of her lips that look more like a grimace, shifting towards the table to put her plate next to Ryujin’s and sets up Yuna’s place in front of them.

The youngest doesn’t ask about why they needed to be alone in the kitchen, steering the conversation towards a new show she’s watching, oblivious to Yeji’s silence.

_Ryujin hasn’t looked at me once_ , Yeji thinks, cutting her pancake slowly. It’s not like she _wants_ Ryujin to only look at her, but.

She wonders if she did something wrong, turns over the events of this morning around her head, frowns deepening when all she concludes is _she pulled away from the kiss first_ , _I almost growled at Yuna,_ and _did I screw it up?_

Beside her, Ryujin wonders the same thing.

There’s a lot to think about. So far, Yeji hasn’t shown signs of being the typical alpha but what Ryujin did—reprimanding her lightly when she almost got all growl-y at Yuna over _pancakes_ —may not have been a welcome behavior from an omega.

They aren’t even dating.

But.

Ryujin reaches a finger out, both of them jumping slightly and blushing when they realize they both reached out at the same time. Their pinkies intertwine in between them, relieved that they hadn’t messed anything up, full and warm as the sunlight fully shines inside their dorm.

All that and Yuna’s blissfully unaware as she forks another mouthful.

**::**

She waited.

“Hey,” Yeji whispers in the dim room, watches as Ryujin’s face lights up before sliding off the couch, and pockets her phone. “You didn’t have to wait up for me.”

“I lost track of time. Was reading a webtoon,” Ryujin deflects, double checks if they properly locked up the practice room behind them. Yeji matches her stride, shoulders thrumming as they brush against each other, close enough to make them blush.

The familiar smell of mild lemons passes their noses as they exit the elevator and duck through the exit, waving at the guard when he tells them _good night_ and to _be careful on the way home_. Street lights are bright and no one’s around except for the occasional person walking their dog at one in the morning.

Yeji tugs on Ryujin’s sleeves, stopping at a crosswalk. “Mind if we walk the long way?”

“Sure,” Ryujin agrees easily, the glint in her eyes knowing as they switch directions.

The long way home means taking the backstreets instead of the main road. It means taking ten more extra minutes of walking. It means fewer chances of bumping into other people. It means— 

Fingers brush against the back of Ryujin’s hand, Yeji ducking her head to catch the younger girl’s eyes. “Can I hold your hand?”

“I don’t know, can you?” She’s got a tongue in between her lips, cheeky, and grinning widely when Yeji rolls her eyes, fond spilling at the crinkles of her eyes.

Yeji doesn’t waste any more time, mindful of the street names and how many more minutes they can stretch this moment out. She slides her hand down, tapping at the soft skin inside Ryujin’s wrist, before intertwining their fingers.

She’s overcome with the urge to bring the back of Ryujin’s hand against her lips, wants to kiss it when the younger girl’s blush makes itself known as they pass a streetlight. She settles for tucking their joined hands inside the pocket of her coat instead.

They stayed that way until they reached their street, uncaring about how clammy their hands became. Chaeryoung is in the middle of making a sandwich when she welcomes them home, attention stolen when a voice drifts from her earphones and her sister is making animated gestures at the phone screen set against a bottle of ketchup.

For the most part, their routine didn’t drastically change.

Ryujin still showers first, squeezes in a little bit of reading for school while Yeji takes hers, then brushes Yeji’s hair for her. Sometimes Yeji takes the little notes she makes and quizzes Ryujin, sometimes they sing their songs quietly, sometimes they’re just silent and let the day’s exhaustion wash over them.

But now, there are _kisses_.

When she guesses which pajama set Ryujin has picked out, she gets a kiss. (Also when she loses. Meaning they kiss regardless, but. They both like to pretend it is not solely because they _want_ to.)

When Ryujin answers her quiz, Yeji drops a kiss against the fabric of her knee as she flips to the next question.

When the brush tangles at a knot, Ryujin bends down to press a kiss against her head.

And before they go to sleep— 

Yeji climbs in Ryujin’s bed first, waits for the younger girl to shut the lamp off, and for their eyes to adjust to the much dimmer glow of the strip light under their bunk bed. She doesn’t pull the covers back, sits on top of them with her back against the wall as the mattress dips under Ryujin’s weight.

“I want to hold your hand again,” Ryujin whispers and Yeji spreads her fingers at the space in front of her, waiting for Ryujin to sit beside her like she always does.

Their hands rest on top of Ryujin’s thigh, Yeji feeling the soft fabric of her pajamas against the back of her hand when Ryujin takes hold of her jaw. The tips of their noses brush softly, a little move they do right before kissing each other.

It was Yeji who leaned in all the way, been impatient since the soft kisses they shared this morning. She chases the mint on Ryujin’s tongue, licking inside the omega’s mouth before retreating to close-mouth kisses.

They pull apart when they hear the sound of Chaeryoung finally retreating to her bedroom. Yeji pushes Ryujin’s hair behind an ear, finally giving in to the urge of pressing her still-wet lips against the back of her hand.

“Good night,” Ryujin whispers as Yeji climbs to her bed.

“Night night, Ryuddaeng.”

“Don’t forget your chapstick. Your lips are a little dry tonight.”

Yeji snorts but does as told. “Yes, ma’am.”

**::**

It’s one of those rare, slow days where Yeji can tug at Ryujin to sit beside her in the cafeteria and stare at the street below them.

“Siblings,” Ryujin corrects, munching around a tomato.

“Fair point,” she mutters, stealing a bite from Ryujin’s plate as the pair turns the street and out of their eyesight. “Guy walking the dog? College student.”

“College student stressed about finals and walks his dog on the way to get food. Two birds in one stone.”

Yeji’s impressed. “There’s no way that’s right.”

“It’s finals seasons and look,” Ryujin commands, even putting down her chopstick to show how serious she was. Yeji does as told. “, bag on his right has the logo of the ramen shop and with the size of that, there’s no way it’s just for one meal. Wardrobe suggests he’s single so no bringing it back to someone. Plus, his dog’s got its tongue out. Means they’ve been walking for a while.”

“Okay, Sherlock,” Yeji pouts, relenting, giving the younger girl a chance to smile at her smugly before pointing at another pair walking down the street. “, how about them? I’m guessing workmates.”

She sees the reflection of Ryujin’s raised eyebrow in the window in front of them. “Judging by how slow they’re walking, I’d say they planned it. With a reservation and everything because there’s no way they’d be that chill during a lunch rush. But maybe not workmates. Though they’re definitely a couple getting lunch.”

Stupidly, Yeji stays silent, heartbeat racing, and she wants to blame it on the direct sunbeam on them when she blurts out: “They could be workmates **_and_** a couple getting lunch.”

_Like us_.

She realizes belatedly she said the last part out loud when Ryujin barks out a laugh, shaking her head like it’s the most hilarious thing Yeji told her and she says—

**::**

Ryujin noticed that Yeji’s been distant lately.

Distant meaning _she stopped holding my hands and kissing me even when we’re alone and I don’t know how to feel about that_.

It’s like the rug’s been pulled under her and Ryujin suddenly falls, cold, and fearful of what she might see at the bottom. She’d like to blame it on the stress. They’re about to debut in a few months and Yeji’s been passing out as soon as she gets home and sleeps until she _absolutely_ needs to wake up.

(It feels a lot like she’s avoiding their routine but Ryujin wants to give her the benefit of the doubt.)

“Anything weird with Yeji-unnie?” Chaeryoung tilts her head to the side, thinking. “I don’t know. She’s more tired, though. And she forgot to fully close the fridge this morning.”

Ryujin’s not satisfied with the answer but she nods anyway. “Thanks, I was just wondering.”

The door to the recording booth opens and Jisoo jerks her head at Ryujin. “You’re up next.”

She decides to think about it more later.

::

It’s not like Yeji’s avoiding Ryujin, but.

The words keep on bouncing inside her head, haunting, mocking her.

Yeji keeps her back pressed against the wall, the faint thrumming of bass amplified as the door opens then dulls down again. She waves an arm when Hyunjin looks lost, avoiding his surprised stare at seeing her huddled at a corner of the dark hallway.

“I’m flattered,” he greets, taking out a pack of M&M’s from his pants and slides down the wall beside her. “A few more meetings like this and I’ll add being a professional matchmaker to my resume.”

“I’m surprised you _haven’t_.”

“I’ll do it tonight,” he grins at her, taking a large mouthful of chocolates before offering her some. “So, Ryujin?”

Yeji nods, carefully picking off the candy shell from the chocolate. She ignores the boy’s affronted yelp when he sees what she’s doing.

“We, uh,” she stares at the exit sign, pops a chocolate in her mouth. “, we kissed.”

He gapes at her. “Totally didn’t expect that, fuck, but go on. _”_

She doesn’t give him the full details; just the ones worth noting (aka her _feelings_ about everything—like how kissing Ryujin makes her feel all fuzzy and warm inside, how she don’t think she’ll ever tire of holding Ryujin’s hand, how their hugs now end lingering in each other’s space and with a light kiss), no sordid detail no matter how much he pries and repeated the words in Ryujin’s voice that followed her for a week now.

_“They could be workmates **and** a couple getting lunch. Like us.”_

_“We’re not a couple, though.”_

Hyunjin sucks in a breath through his teeth, grimacing. “Ouch.”

Burying her face in her hands, Yeji groans, hoping the ground swallows up because even though it’s been a week, it still sinks a bad feeling in her stomach. Ouch indeed.

And the worst part of it all is that Ryujin seems unaware of how much her words shook Yeji’s insides, leaving a wide crack inside of her that stings every time Ryujin step towards her—to hold her hand, for a hug, for a damned _kiss_ ; Yeji doesn’t know, doesn’t let the younger girl get close—and Yeji takes two steps back, away.

“Actually,” Hyujin murmurs after a few minutes of silence between them, deep in thought. “Don’t take my word for this but this is just something I noticed, so.” He clears his throat, picking out his choice of words carefully. “Ryujin seems like the kind of person who deflects, you know? Like someone who won’t be caught admitting that they like someone first. The person who’ll tease you instead of answering a question.”

“But she,” Yeji looks down the hallway, hushing her voice even when it’s empty. “, she _kisses_ me. What does that mean?”

“Yeah but think of the very first time you did that. I bet you were the one who made the first move.”

Yeji thinks back, can’t forget the morning light beating down her back and Ryujin’s crossed-eyes at their closeness, not wanting to close her eyes until she absolutely had to. “I kissed her first but it was on the cheek.”

Hyunjin throws a finger right at her nose, smug. “ _Still._ You made the first move so she took it as a go sign.” He starts standing up, dusting the seat of his pants. “I suggest you two talk about what… you two are. I agree with Ryujin, you’re not a couple just because you kiss. So just,” he makes a sweeping gesture down the hallway, tilting his head in an angle that makes him look _exactly_ like her. Just with shorter hair. “, talk about it.”

When she walks back to their side of the floor, the palm of her hands stained with different colors of the candy shell she took off the chocolate, she made up her mind.

She’ll talk with Ryujin.

**::**

—which she keeps putting off.

No matter how many times she chants in front of the mirror _today is the day_ , she clams up when Ryujin is right _there_. And with how frustrated the younger girl looks at her with every poor excuse to flee, it was only a matter of time before one of them snaps.

Hint: it was not Yeji.

“Come with me,” Ryujin sounds strained, her hoodie unable to hide how tense her shoulders are.

They end up at an empty studio, Ryujin pushing her inside the dim recording booth and the door closing heavily behind her. The force of it sends the scent of Ryujin’s body wash to Yeji’s nose and she had to grip at the soft foam soundproofing to keep herself steady.

“Hi,” she greets lamely.

“You,” Ryujin points a finger at her, jaw tense. “, are avoiding me. Why?”

She knows it’s coming, has thought about it a lot, and Yeji has the words lined up in her head.

“I don’t want to take advantage of you,” she exhales, the heaviness she’s been feeling every time she pulls away from Ryujin not easing. “You…I like you and I don’t know if I’m just projecting or if you want this too or _maybe_ I’m already crossing lines and it’s just that I want to _know_ where we stand and—you’re not saying anything.”

Wringing her hands together, Yeji feels herself getting more and more anxious as Ryujin’s face twists with every word, finally settling on _anger_.

“You are not,” Ryujin stomps over, finger pressing harshly at the middle of Yeji’s chest and she winces but doesn’t pull away. Not this time. “, doing anything wrong. I like you too, dummy. And do you think I just _kiss_ anyone? No.” She huffs, face still hard and unrelenting pressure. “I thought _I_ was the one who did something wrong. You just… pulled back.” 

Yeji can’t even enjoy the admission when she sees a flicker of hurt passes the younger girl’s eyes but Yeji picks up on it and has been watching Ryujin’s face for the entire time.

“You’re right,” she leans against the soft wall behind her, drained. “I was dumb and let a stupid game get to me.”

“Wait, what game?”

Yeji bites her lips, suddenly embarrassed. “When we were people watching… you said we weren’t a couple.”

Ryujin’s eyebrows meet in the middle, confused. “Because we’re _not,_ ” she shakes her head, an unbelieving smile on her face as she takes Yeji’s hand, bracelets her fingers around a delicate wrist, warm. “We haven’t even had our first date yet.”

Her eyelashes flutter, Yeji moving her arm so their fingers can intertwine in between them. She _really_ likes where this conversation is going, getting giddy at the thought. “So, I can ask you out on a date?”

Ryujin steps closer, happy to finally be in a space where it’s just the two of them and Yeji isn’t pulling back. (She’ll ignore that she’s blocking the only exit and that she’s got Yeji literally against a wall.)

Teasingly, she grins. “I don’t know, can you?”

Yeji mirrors her grin, a whole lot dopey. “I’d like to.”

“Okay,” Ryujin nods, thinking that they already danced around this thing in between them for a long time. “Let’s date.”

When Yeji leans familiarly, Ryujin ducks out of her way and is already halfway out of the door before Yeji can blink.

“No kisses before the first date!”

Yeji shakes her head, a smile eating at her face, and it should scare her how willing she is to do anything for Ryujin.

(It doesn’t.)

**::**

It was hard enough to get free time with how tight their schedules are, much less fitting a date somewhere in between changing out heels and recording. But they somehow came up with a plan.

“Nice,” Yeji beamed, eyeing Ryujin’s frantic and wide eyes, rooted with her back against their bedroom door, giggling when she noticed the white-knuckled grip the younger girl has on the bag of food they had delivered.

“Woah.”

Yeji feels her spine straightening, proud when Ryujin looks around the redecoration she did to their room, nothing too elaborate that’ll be a pain to clean up after. “It was hard to do that to our desks but,” she shrugs, softly taking the bags from Ryujin and neatly placing them on their desks pushes side to side, an electric candle in the middle (it’ll be hard to explain in case it turns out to be a fire hazard) with the heart-shaped chocolates she bought on the way home.

“Looks romantic,” Ryujin approves, groaning when she takes off her thick hoodie under the warmth of the room and Yeji stutters in her steps.

“I, uh, didn’t know you’d be—” she gestures lamely at Ryujin, tears her eyes away when she realizes she’s been starting. “I should’ve dressed nicer.”

There’s nothing _new_ about what Ryujin’s wearing but she looks nice, beautiful—nothing to hint that they’ve barely got five hours of sleep last night. She’s wearing a simple top, tight enough to compliment and leaving Yeji feeling horribly underdressed.

Ryujin smirks, stepping close to dust off Yeji’s shoulders for something that isn’t there. “You look good, don’t worry.”

Yeji nods, not trusting her mouth to work. She hurries to pull out a chair, making a grand sweeping gesture to which Ryujin good-humoredly accepted with a blinding smile. Unsure of where to put her hands when she notices how _soft_ Ryujin looks with the blush still high on her cheeks when hiding their food from their bandmates.

They’ve both decided on keeping _them_ a secret for a while— although Yeji was honest in telling the younger girl that Hyunjin knows, Ryujin just snickers, shaking her head with an _of course he knows_ —wanting to see where this takes them.

The night passes pleasantly, both willing to ignore their early call time tomorrow morning in favor of not rushing their little date.

“Come on,” Ryujin wiggles her fingers, ears pressed against their bedroom door, listening for any movement outside.

Yeji abandons the table cloth, pushing their tables back to where it was, dusting her hands to make sure they’re relatively clean before reaching out to take Ryujin’s. “What’s up?”

Ryujin slowly opens their door, pleased when the only light open is the one by the front door, tugging Yeji out of their room and into the darkness of the hallway. She’s grinning, both of them in their bare feet, her little dimple whiskers so prominent that Yeji wants to kiss each line.

“Think of this as me walking you to your front door after the first date,” Ryujin whispers, smiling widely, happy she thought of this and Yeji— 

She kind of has a hard time breathing properly, chest expanding with the amount of affection she suddenly feels for this girl in front of her.

“Thank you for tonight,” she whispers back just as softly, fingers still linked and their clothes smelling faintly like the food they had. “I really had fun.”

Ryujin scrunches her nose, leaning in. “I’ve always wanted to kiss someone at the door after a date.”

It’s a little risky with the shadows dancing under Chaeryoung’s door and the soft footsteps in the other two’s bedroom, but Ryujin kisses her surely, firmly, and pushes her back against the door until Yeji has no other choice but to get lost in it.

“Get home safely,” Yeji plays along to their little roleplaying, opening the door behind her.

“I will,” Ryujin promises, her smile the last thing Yeji sees as she shuts the door.

She gives herself a moment to soak the moment in, lips loose from happiness and her cheeks suffering from smiling all evening. Yeji’s in the middle of bumping her fist in the air when Ryujin slips back inside the room.

“I forgot to take that with me,” she nods to the bag of trash, half of her body still outside the hallway.

Yeji laughs, loud and sudden, feeling absolutely silly because _oh my god, I’m dating my roommate_. Ryujin looks at her funny and a little fond, crossing the distance between them to give Yeji a peck.

They both don’t have any other basis but as far as first dates go, this will definitely be one they’ll remember for a long time.

**::**

The first time they sleep together goes like this:

It’s been half an hour and it’s starting to drive Ryujin to madness.

One. Toss. At. A. **_Time_**.

Sheets above her rustle again, the whole bed frame moving under them as Yeji turns in her bed, and Ryujin had enough. She kicks her blanket away, planting both feet against the mattress on top of her, and _pushes_.

“Ryujin?” Yeji’s face pops at the edge, the only thing that Ryujin can make out is the general blob of the alpha, but she can hear the slight grumpiness of fitful sleep and the pout on the older girl’s lips.

“Unless you want me to knock you out, get down here,” she grumbled, scooching towards the wall and taking a surreptitious whiff of her sheets, remembering it’s been a while since she changed them with their schedules getting tighter. “I’ll hold you down until you fall asleep if I need to.”

Yeji doesn’t say anything and Ryujin begins to doze off when the bed shifts again, this time the stairs of the bunk bed creaking until her sheets are pulled back, cold feet bumping against hers that jarred her to a moment of sudden wakefulness.

She turns on her side, waiting for the older girl to settle. They’re facing each other and up this close with her eyes adjusted to the dark, Ryujin can make out the slightly furrowed eyebrows, and cat-like eyes closed tightly. She finds Yeji’s hands cold in between them, covering them and pressing them against her lips to keep them warm.

“You okay?”

Yeji moves closer to Ryujin’s warmth. “Just nervous.”

Ryujin nods, curls her legs until her knees knock against solid thighs. “Me too.”

This time, Yeji opens her eyes, and Ryujin stares back at her. “What if I make a mistake?”

“I’ll probably laugh at you,” she answers honestly—maybe a little bit _too_ honest because it has Yeji snorting—words etched against Yeji’s knuckles against her lips. “But I’ll be right beside you the whole time.”

Yeji nods, a grateful smile on her face. “I’ll do the same to you, you know?”

“Wouldn’t expect anything less, leader-nim.”

It’s quiet, all of them given most of the day off to rest, and with restless energy vibrating in their bones, Ryujin cooked a proper dinner for all of them before everyone retreated to their rooms to panic-slash-prepare for their comeback tomorrow.

Yeji hums when Ryujin asks if she was still awake. “Jisoo-unnie told me I’m glowing. During recording. I think it got caught in the video promotion.”

The bed moves, Yeji propping herself up on her elbow to squint at Ryujin. “No, you’re not, she’s lying.”

Ryujin blinks, shifting so she’s on her back, waiting for the joke to land and— 

“ _Oh my god_ , you’re so lame. Not _literally_ , dummy.”

Yeji laughs, dropping on her stomach as she pokes Ryujin’s ribs with a finger. She halts when she feels bare skin, blushing when she realizes the shirt must have ridden up at some point but doesn’t take back her hand. She softens when Ryujin guides her hand properly to rest against a bare hip, the warmth of her calming Yeji. “What does it mean, then?”

Ryujin tugs at her hand until she touches the whole strip of skin on Ryujin’s abdomen, stopping as she gets her arm loosely wrapped around the younger girl and Yeji adjusts herself, resting on her side as she holds Ryujin carefully against her, warm and soft, sharing the same pillow.

“It means I’m happy.”

Yeji inches closer until she’s pressing her own smile against the side of Ryujin’s head. “Same here. I’m happy, too.”

They fall asleep tangled in each other and when the new day comes and goes, ITZY has finally debuted.

**::**

“I’m so sorry!”

The bedroom door slams shut, Yeji red-faced as she blinks at it rapidly, grasping at the cold hallway wallpaper and causing enough ruckus for Yuna to peek from the living room.

“You alright, unnie?”

She nods. “Yeah, sorry, I’m—”

The door opens. “Get in here,” Ryujin hisses, grabs a hold on Yeji’s arm before she can blink, pulling her inside their room and closing the door behind her. “I can explain.”

Yeji tried her best, she _really_ did, but her eyes betrayed her, sweeping towards the bottom bunk of the bed and it’s right _there_. A familiar shirt is tucked in between a pillow and its case, one of her hoodies is peeking underneath the blanket, spread over the bed is one of her spare blankets, and then— 

“You’re wearing my sweats,” it’s a little long on Ryujin, pooling around her ankles and there’s still a stain of hot sauce on the right thigh that never came off even after many washes. “You’re… are you nesting?”

Ryujin went red, self-consciously tugging at the hem of her shirt as if to shield it from Yeji’s eyes. “It’s the stress, I need to calm down,” she runs a hand through her hair, tousling it beautifully that Yeji barely resisted closing in and doing the same, ending it with a kiss, preferably. “And you smell nice.”

The last part was hushed and Yeji felt the air punched out of her. It’s, like, the highest level of compliment anyone can receive. But thanks to the suppressant implants they’ve had since they presented, they can’t really smell each other’s pheromones.

Still.

Yeji doesn’t realize what she’s doing, it’s like she’s having an out of body experience, and before she knows it, she’s already pulled Ryujin in her space, kissing her. She kisses her softly, moans when her hands land on the omega’s hips and the familiar fabric reminds her that it’s _her_ clothes Ryujin’s wearing. 

Her clothes on _her_ omega.

She noses her way down a soft jaw, placing wet kisses until Ryujin shudders in her arms, moaning high at the back of her throat, arching her neck beautifully to receive Yeji’s lips. The alpha’s right on top of her scent gland, and both of them aren’t releasing pheromones—can’t—yet the instinctual gesture has her keening, scrambling for purchase as she clutches the back of Yeji’s shirt, holding on.

“I bet you smell good,” she comments offhandedly, an answer to Ryujin’s earlier statement but the effect of it is burning.

Ryujin _moans_ , a proper and full sound that no doubt will carry outside of their bedroom. She bites her lips at the middle of it, eyes glazed as Yeji stares at her in wonder, the red of her face blooming to something deeper and Yeji discovered that she likes the sound. She likes it a _lot_.

Yeji shifts, moves until she’s sitting on Ryujin’s bed and pulling the younger girl on her lap with enough space in between them. They hold each other, Ryujin naturally playing with Yeji’s hair and the alpha just loosely holding Ryujin’s waist as they both calm down, holds each other until the roaring of their blood simmer to something slower, tame.

“Do you,” Ryujin’s voice is shy, a little hoarse, and Yeji grips her tighter by instinct, feels herself stirring inside of her pants. She peeks down to make sure nothing’s showing too much and that they have a reasonable space in between them to avoid an accidental rubbing on… something. “, do you think anyone heard?”

“I don’t know,” she answers honestly, her voice not any better. “She has her headphones around her neck earlier though.”

“Good,” she feels a nod, and Yeji waits, can feel the energy radiating off of Ryujin and she’s right when Ryujin pulls back to look at her properly. “If we’re going to do something like that again,” she mutters and Yeji’s just stuck on _again_. “, not when anyone’s around, okay?”

Yeji nods, agreeing, silently hoping the moment comes soon.

“And if you, uh, need anything else for your nest,” she looks at the bundle of sheets they’re currently on top of. It’s cozy. “, just tell me.”

Ryujin answers by pushing her by the shoulders until they’re lying down, cuddling.

“This way, your scent’ll cling better.”

They ignore that Yeji hasn’t slept in her bed for two weeks now, doesn’t bother climbing when they’ve done their nightly routine.

“Okay,” Yeji settles more, opening her arms and waits for Ryujin to fuss around her nest before nodding in content, lying beside her. “Just a lil nap.”

“M’kay. Night, Yeddeong.

Yeji kisses her forehead. “Night, Ryuddaeng.”

**::**

Okay, here’s the thing: they’re dating.

But Yeji still wants to court Ryujin.

She doesn’t have a lick of knowledge of how to come through with it. The internet’s proving to be a little useless. Most of the blog posts and articles she read points to courting being a social construct, an outdated ideal, or for the extremists, something done before the actual mating.

(Yeji exits that link as fast as she could, face flaming at the thought of them— _no_. Not thinking about that, nope.)

(The traitorous part of her mind sings _not yet, at least._ )

And when anyone asks, Yeji honestly _can’t_ remember what else happened during her… research. She opts to leave Hyunjin out of this one, wants to be the one who figures this out.

But now, face to face with a pink-faced Ryujin, hair still dripping at the dyed tips, looking at her _very_ strangely, Yeji squirms self-consciously, mind racing and waiting for the coming rejection.

“Uh,” Ryujin looks down at her hands, turning the box around and giving it a little jiggle, and _yup_ , it’s the real thing. “, toothpaste?”

Yeji winces, shoulders hunching as she feels the embarrassment eat away at her. In the smallest voice possible, she asks: “You don’t like it?”

“Wait, wait,” Ryujin doesn’t let go of the box, keeps it tight against her chest. “, it’s nice but like,” she looks inside their bathroom, confirming that they’re not running out of stock anytime soon. “, why?”

Ryujin watches as the alpha self-consciously rubs at the sleeve of her shirt, taking a little step back and looking like she’d rather bolt outside than to answer the question. Eventually, the older girl takes a deep breath, not looking at Ryujin when she admits:

“I want to court you and… and the websites said to pick something that’ll be useful to you but not offensive like money or something. And besides, you use it every day so I thought… I even got the one you said you liked, not the one the company buys in bulk for us.”

With every word, Ryujin feels something warm stirring inside of her, a warmth she wants to share with Yeji, hug her until there’s absolutely no space in between them.

“You want to court me?”

Yeji blinks, mouth in an awkward twist as she stops mid-word. “I—yes. Yes, I’d like to if that’s alright.”

Courting is serious. This means that Yeji is willing to make this work no matter how much their career gets hectic and no matter how much it’ll eat them that they can’t be a normal couple. Courting is— 

“You want that? With me?” There’s an odd self-depreciative tone in her voice that has Yeji frowning.

“Yes,” she firmly asserted, eyes serious and unwavering before turning soft. “With you. Just you.”

Ryujin opens the box, uncaring if she’s brushing her teeth for the second time tonight, immediately comforted with the scent of bubblegum and the familiar taste on her tongue that reminds her of home, no matter how silly it is.

She makes sure Yeji could taste it hours later, sitting with their backs against the wall in Ryujin’s bunk, kissing each other slowly.

It should scare her how much she wants this, the finality and sureness of how much she likes this girl who’s playing with the tips of her hair with nothing but adoration in her eyes.

It should scare her that Yeji’s the first person she felt this way for—

It should scare her with how _sure_ every fiber of her knowing that no one will come after Yeji—

It should scare her.

But she just sleeps soundly, cheeks pink and Yeji’s _good night_ echoing in her mind.

**::**

It’s getting out of control lately.

This constant need to be close to Ryujin, to be in her space. Sometimes it’s not enough to just be in front of her, Yeji finding a way so they can sit next to each other, wants something as simple as their shoulders bumping as they share an inside joke.

And what’s exhilarating is that Ryujin doesn’t hold back on touching lately.

Arms around her shoulder even though Yeji’s the taller one, a hand inside the back pocket of her jeans, soft fingers pressing the crook of her elbow, a finger hooked on her belt hoops as she pulls her in— 

“Mm,” Yeji lets out a noise that has Ryujin chasing it from inside her mouth, scratching her nails against the soft baby hairs at the older girl’s nape tickling the inside of her wrist. She pulls back to breathe, can’t resist giving a chaste kiss as she sees the same awed look on Yeji’s face since she got back from the salon.

“I take it you like it?”

Fingers trails against her shoulders, stopping at the edge of her newly-dyed hair. “Yeah,” Yeji exhales, tentatively gathering some of it in her fingers, watching them slip in between each knuckle like water. “Pink suits you well.”

Here’s the thing about Ryujin and compliments; she’s grown desensitized to them. Being in an industry where fake smiles and compliments are a necessary weapon wielded with deadly precision.

But somehow something warm sinks inside of her when the compliment falls from Yeji’s lips, making her slip further on the alpha’s lap, close enough for their shirts to touch, making her bite her lip and toss her hair on one shoulder to expose her throat.

And Yeji just… she touches Ryujin’s jaw softly, reverently, and when she kisses her, it’s soft soft _soft_.

Any other day it might’ve been welcomed but lately, Ryujin’s been _craving_ more. Has been wanting to press herself firmly until their bellies are touching, until there’s no chance for air to come in between them, until she can feel what makes Yeji an alpha, hard and just for her.

Guilt eats at her, making her fingertips cold as she slips off of a warm lap and looks away quickly as Yeji turns to adjust herself discreetly inside her jeans.

Because Yeji— pure and innocent Yeji— deserves romance and star-freckled skies, not a quick romp in their bedroom with their bandmates in the next room, playing Ring Fit and with their second comeback just around the corner.

No, Yeji deserves the best.

And Ryujin will see to it that it’s what she’ll get even to the expense of her own sexual frustration.

She sighs, waves off the alpha’s questioning look, and stealthily changes her underwear in the bathroom.

**::**

Yeji likes to think that by this point, she knows Ryujin pretty well.

She’s still learning to know _when_ Ryujin means it when she’s annoyed but Yeji knows when she needs space, a long bath, whether something spicy or sweet for dinner, if she wants to be held or be the big spoon, when she’s too hot or in need of a proper blanket-tuck—the point is: there are only a few things she’s yet to discover.

And she added this one to the list.

_Why is Ryujin holding back?_

She’s obvious about it. When they’re kissing long enough for Yeji’s chest to feel tight with shortness of breath, Ryujin holds her at bay with a palm on her chest, and just when Yeji thinks they’ll resume the same pace, Ryujin will slant her mouth just _so_ , slowing their kisses down.

Yeji can feel it. The tiny spasms of the younger woman’s hands to keep things slow, little earthquakes under her skin, and the inferno in her eyes when she wipes her wet lips with the back of her hand and what feels like a whole galaxy of space in between them.

Ryujin wants more, maybe even more than Yeji herself can imagine, so she doesn’t get _why_ she’s holding back.

**::**

Ryujin likes to think that by this point, she knows Yeji pretty well.

She’s still learning to know _when_ Yeji is starting to feel stretched thin with her responsibilities but Ryujin knows what music to play in their room as they go about their routine, whether she needs a head massage or a back rub, just how tight to hold her when they fall asleep—the point is: there are only a few things she’s yet to discover.

And she added this one to the list.

_How well does she read me?_

Ryujin prides in her self-control, knows when to pull away from their rapidly-heating kisses so she doesn’t do something stupid like _begging_. She likes to think she’s above that but lately…

Lately, Yeji doesn’t let her get away too far. Be it a hand tangled against her hair, tugging at the roots enough for Ryujin to still and the tension in her to melt, or fingers digging at her hips enough to leave light imprints when she sneaks away to change yet another ruined underwear.

Just as she pulls back, Yeji steps in. And Ryujin really, _really_ doesn’t know how long she can keep the desire to do **_more_ **at bay.

After all, she can only endure so much until she snaps.

**::**

As expected, it doesn’t take long.

And if only Ryujin had a warning at how _good_ Yeji looks with her hair curly from being in braids all day, how intoxicating it was to wrap one of the curls around her fingers and how pliantly the alpha will come closer as she tugs then _maybe_ — 

Maybe they could’ve made it to their bedroom.

“You sure it’s locked?” Ryujin pants, can’t stop combing her fingers through Yeji’s hair, nosing at a temple as hands hold her hips firmly.

“Yeah,” is all Yeji can say, eyes focused on Ryujin’s lips in front of her and the bare skin on her palms. She takes a bottom lip, biting it a little and relishing the way the omega squirms in her lap.

They’re on the living room couch, the first ones to go home after filming the thank you version of ICY’s dance practice since Jisoo had Chaeryoung go over the choreography with her for a bit and Yuna decided to join in. Ryujin’s been teasing her ever since Yeji and Yuna opted to wear the onesie all day, chasing each other all over the hallway and snickering when TWICE members cooed at them.

One moment Yeji was reassuring their manager that she can have dinner outside while they stay in, and the next, as soon as the front door closes, Ryujin pushes her down to the couch, climbing her lap.

Ryujin opens her mouth, hips stuttering forward as Yeji sucks on her tongue. She holds tightly against broad shoulders, surrenders helplessly as Yeji’s hands trace higher and under her shirt, stopping right at the edge of her bra.

“Do it,” she moans, tries to catch her breath as the older girl fumbles with eager fingers. The pressure on her chest loosens and Ryujin has half a mind to care when she whips her shirt off. Yeji stares at her chest for a moment, frozen, and when she dares to brush a thumb against a nipple, Ryujin rocks forward, enough to feel Yeji hard under her.

“Oh,” Yeji murmurs, can’t decide where to look. The weight of Ryujin’s breast on her palm makes her want to bend her head down and _suck_. While the weight of _Ryujin_ on top of her cock, separated by her jeans and Ryujin’s shorts, makes her lose her mind.

Deciding for her, she feels fingernails raking against her scalp softly, and Yeji groans as her top lip bump against a straining nipple. The feeling of wet heat nearly makes Ryujin shout, muscles moving, and her clit bumps against the seam of her shorts, and the pressure of Yeji’s cock is _perfect_.

_“Oh my **god**!”_ She throws her head back, biting her lip to keep any more noises in, grinding down to chase the pressure against her center. Ryujin can already tell that she’s slick, has been ever since they tumbled inside the dorm knowing that they’re alone even for just an hour, can feel her underwear sliding along her folds.

Once Yeji was satisfied with the wine-red color of one nipple, she pulls back to take the other, one hand traces the line of Ryujin’s abs down down _down_ until she had both thumbs slotted against jutting hip bones.

She stops.

“Hey,” she greets softly, smiling at Ryujin’s wild eyes. “, there you are. Is this okay?”

“You—you stopped to _ask?”_ Ryujin feels a little hysterical, wants to pull Yeji back against her chest and continue the wonders she was doing. She wants to cry, just a little bit, because _of course Yeji would ask for permission first_.

Ryujin still got her hands over the alpha’s shoulders and felt the muscles bunch as Yeji shrugs. “I need to know you want this.”

_Fuck_. “I do,” Ryujin rushes out, keeping herself steady so she can grind forward and watch as Yeji’s eyelids flutter at the pressure. “I do, so, please. Please.”

Yeji nods, kisses the middle of her chest once, and whispers. “Okay, but I’m not gonna fuck you, okay?” Ryujin can’t help but whimper. Yeji _never_ cusses and to know that she’s enough to _make_ her, is making her blood rush quickly, the deep warmth of arousal spilling out of her. “Just going to help you take the edge off, is that alright?”

Ryujin nods, impatient, and the last she sees is Yeji’s eyes smiling softly at her before she tosses her head back, a moan knocked out of her as Yeji moves her hips in a way that circles her clit _perfectly_.

The couch underneath them barely makes a sound as Yeji starts thrusting upwards, a sinful thing that has Ryujin keening. Yeji doesn’t look as composed as her action, eyes half-lidded and mouth left open, watching as Ryujin’s breasts bounce lightly in front of her, balls heavy and cock twitching as she feels the power of Ryujin’s thighs bracket around her, squeezing her waist as they both work for the omega’s pleasure.

“I can smell you, how wet you are,” Yeji groans, manipulating Ryujin on her lap as she does figure-eights on top of her cock, rubbing at the head perfectly and judging by the way Ryujin pants, it’s working for her too. “You must be making a mess right now.”

_“Fuck!_ You can’t— _hah—_ say stuff like that.”

“Why?” she questions wetly, can’t help but suck a bright red hickey at the center of the younger girl’s chest.

“ _Unnie_ ,” Ryujin whines, cut off in the middle to shudder, body spasming for a second before resuming on her mission with more vigor than before. Yeji finds herself pressed tightly against the cushions, can’t do anything but take the unrelenting pressure of Ryujin using her body to orgasm. “Because it makes me want to just— _oh fuuh—_ fuck you right now.”

It’s already risky enough when Ryujin took off her shirt, dangerous and they both know it, with the borrowed time they have right now. And they need to finish before anyone comes home or else it’s another couple of weeks—or if they’re not lucky, _months—_ of waiting before an opportunity like this comes again.

“Okay, okay, ‘m sorry,” Yeji soothes, kissing Ryujin hard on the mouth, down her jaw, and stopping right on top of her scent gland.

The reaction is instantaneous. Ryujin’s breath stutters, stuck somewhere high in her throat and halfway through her lips, and the only reason she’s still on Yeji’s lap is because of the alpha’s firm grip on her, not relenting on the pressure of her thrusting hips. Ryujin comes sweetly, a soft and stifled moan right against Yeji’s ear, rocking to prolong the pleasure.

Yeji peppers kisses all over her face as she comes down, cooing sweet nothings and compliments. She holds Ryujin close, mindful to keep her mind off of the pulsing pressure in between her legs, and she’s too busy thinking about foster animals and the year-old yogurt her sister left in their backyard last summer to notice Ryujin’s hand creeping in front of her.

“Mm,” Ryujin hums, feeling the shape through Yeji’s jeans. She circles over the head, the leather of the couch wrinkling under Yeji’s fingers as she digs her nails in.

“What are you doing?”

Ryujin smiles coyly, eyes still gone, but her palm is solid, her thumb idle. “Getting you off.”

“You don’t have to, you know,” is what she says but Yeji helps the omega in undoing her button and slide down the zipper, exhaling through gritted teeth when Ryujin’s warm fingers pull her out of her and into the cool air of the dorm.

Ryujin doesn’t answer her, focusing on her little mission. Her fingers barely meet around the girth, the visuals of it has Yeji rolling her head to the back cushions of the couch. She makes a loose fist, curious as precum starts to dribble down the length.

Their foreheads meet, Ryujin leaning against Yeji for support. “Show me how you like it?”

Yeji nods, already beyond words. Her hands are bigger than Ryujin’s but not by much, she tightens the hold, eyes on Ryujin as the omega’s lips fall into an _o_. “Thumb on the head,” her voice is gruff, moaning when Ryujin does as told, the next downstroke slick.

She wants to make this last, to hold off and enjoy the same focused gaze of Ryujin that she attributes to when the younger girl wants to be good at something. But Ryujin barely needs her guidance, experimenting on whichever motion pulls the best reaction out of Yeji and when she twists her wrist at the base, Yeji’s hands shoot off to grab Ryujin’s thighs.

“Close?” Ryujin asks, breathless like she’s the one on the verge of coming.

“Mm-hmm.”

Whole body pulsing at one point, Yeji covers the head of her cock with her palms, nodding for Ryujin to continue. She comes with a soft exhale, catching most of the mess with her hand. Yeji feels boneless, like the feeling of lying down after a whole day of swimming, floating, and flowing.

“Well,” Ryujin whispers, removing her hand and Yeji blushes when the omega stares at the string of come that got caught on her fingers. “, we better clean up fast.”

Yeji nods, mind well on the way to turning into mush. Ryujin shakes her head fondly, kissing a sweaty forehead before helping her fix her jeans with one hand.

It’s later, much later when the panic of the girls coming home ten minutes after they clean up is gone, that Yeji makes a promise.

“Next time,” she’s flustered, stuttering even after what they’ve done. “, we’ll do it properly.”

Ryujin agrees, holding out her pinky. “Next time.”

**::**

It’s hard to plan _anything_ let alone get even two days off. Somehow, they need to _be here_ or _be there_ or _an appearance here_ or a _show up “unexpectedly” there_ at eighteen hours of every day and it’s _exhausting_.

It’s _months_ later that they finally work something out.

Two days, that’s all they get. A little reprieve for the great success of their start, a reward to let them re-group a bit before they’re off to do bigger, better things.

Yuna was supposed to stay at the dorm but Jisoo persuaded her to come with her and her parents to a fancy night out. Chaeryoung promised her little sister to give her signed copies of their last two albums so she’ll be going home.

Ryujin said that she’s going home for a quiet weekend but in truth, she’s coming with Yeji to Jeonju, away from Seoul. Her older sister has an apartment near her university and her parents are leaving for Gwangju for a wedding the night she and Ryujin arrive.

So.

“We’re alone?” Ryujin makes sure, reaching over to adjust the brim of Yeji’s hat. It’s fine but wouldn’t hurt to be _too_ careful.

“Yeah,” she carefully glances at an elderly woman who has them in her field of vision but she seems too engrossed with swiping at her phone to pay attention to them. Yeji interlocks their fingers, can’t kiss the back of Ryujin’s hands with the masks in the way, so she stuffs their hands inside the pocket of her coat. “Just us.”

**::**

It’s like a crude version of foreplay.

They both know what’ll happen in the evening, the purpose of their little getaway, and the wait for it makes later all the more worth it.

Yeji’s parents are kind enough to pick them up from the station, asking typical questions of when their now-celebrity daughter brings home another celebrity friend. Her mom cooks a feast even though there’s just four of them, and doesn’t let them move an inch from the living room after eating.

“Want to take a nap?” she asks the younger girl, currently sprawled on their couch, bundled up in the afghan her mom made a few years back, cheeks a little pink from the warmth.

Ryujin looks at her sleepily. “Sure.”

Her parents didn’t do much to her bedroom apart from dusting and cleaning now and then. The sheets were changed and everything was in place, including a small bear she always had since she was little. It’s tiny now but Yeji likes to keep it on the top of her bed.

Ryujin waddles in, still wrapped and pouts. “What, no idol posters?”

“I tried but gunk keeps sticking and my dad made me clean and repaint my walls one summer. Not worth it.”

Disapprovingly, Ryujin tuts, inviting herself and pulling back the covers, lying down with Yeji still standing at the foot of the bed.

“Poster tapes exist,” the snark of it is drowned by the visual of her rolling around in Yeji’s childhood bed, arms stretched like a cat.

“Okay, well, I’ll let you settle down. I’ll just,” she opens the top of her bedside drawer, remembers it’s where she keeps her headbands and hair ties, and _absolutely_ not a box of unopened alpha condoms. Yeji jumps back like she’s burned, closing the drawer with so much force that it rattles the lamp. Ryujin looks at her with an icy glare for disturbing the silence. “I—mom, need to talk with my momberight _back_.”

She stomps all the way to the kitchen, her dad looking up from his phone when she tugs her mom out to the hallway.

“ _Why?”_

Turns out that motherly instincts are more dangerous than they seem, her mom seeing right through her when she called a couple of days ago to let them know that she’s coming home with a friend. _Precaution_ , she calls them, says she trusts Yeji to know the importance of protection but went ahead to make sure they don’t run out.

Yeji doesn’t miss the way her mom bought a box with _twenty-four_ packets.

She waves her parents off from the end of the driveway, still red in the face, and when she comes back to her room, Ryujin had already claimed the left side of the bed, curled facing the middle, and Yeji quietly adds the smaller box of three she bought. It looks tiny next to the other but both serve the same purpose.

Changing into an old shirt from middle school, Yeji lays down, moving so she’s spooning Ryujin into her arms and tries not to get too excited about what’ll happen when they wake up.

**::**

Yeji’s bed is _definitely_ bigger and sturdier than their bunk bed.

Ryujin was the first to wake up, the last of the orange rays of the sunset lighting up Yeji’s childhood bedroom. The house is quiet, so that means Yeji’s parents are gone and she’s got about three different ways she can wake up Yeji but instead, she explores the room, allowing the older girl to catch up on sleep for a while.

There are a few medals and knick-knacks scattered, photos of Yeji and her hometown friends in various stages of their childhood, and school activities tacked on a corkboard behind the door. She’s too busy gushing over a picture of a younger Yeji holding up a 2PM poster when the bed creaks behind her.

The moment she’s back in bed, Yeji moves so quickly like she hasn't been snoring for the last hour. They’re kissing before Ryujin can properly lie down, frantic and a little desperate, emotions stifled and tossed to the side for the sake of their careers comes careening at full force, leaving behind a mess of tangled limbs as they undress each other.

“I want to do something first,” Yeji huffs out in between wet kisses on Ryujin’s neck. All the omega can do is nod and for the first time, feel so _free_ that she doesn’t have to keep down her moans.

Yeji starts kissing her way down, taking her time on sucking hickeys in between Ryujin’s breasts, down the visible lines of her abdomen, down down _down—_

She stops at the waistband of Ryujin’s panties, licking her lips. This close, she can already smell the omega’s arousal, even with the fabric of her panties in the way. There’s the visible bump of her clit, swollen and ready, a wet patch in the middle of the fabric, and Yeji’s only human, can’t resist so she licks right over it, tongue broad and heavy and gets a keening moan from Ryujin.

She looks so good up there, hair tossed in between the two pillows, eyes on Yeji’s every movement but already half-gone. Gingerly, Yeji peels off the underwear, kissing the redness it leaves on the crease of where Ryujin’s pussy and thighs meet.

“Smells good,” she grunts, delighted to feel and see Ryujin already dripping, making a mess of her sheets. She’s got both arms wrapped under Ryujin’s strong thighs and opens her fingers when Ryujin reaches down to intertwine them with hers. Ryujin nods at Yeji’s questioning stare, squeezing her hand once for confirmation. Yeji gets a taste. “Tastes good, too.”

Ryujin doesn’t know what to say to that— _thank you? —_ so she just cants her hips higher, chasing the pressure. She can _hear_ how wet she is, each lick is obscene, and knowing that it’s Yeji, her alpha, doing this to her, more slick gushes out of her.

She figures out a pattern, like how Ryujin favors fast licks on the right side of her clit, how dipping the tip of her tongue shallowly against the entrance can make the thighs around her shake, and how Ryujin can take two of her fingers with no additional lube necessary.

Ryujin starts coming when she hooks her fingers against the front wall, knowing about it from nights of researching while Ryujin sleeps beside her. Yeji’s jaw aches, her forearm straining with effort, but it’s worth it to _hear_ just how high the pitch of Ryujin’s voice can go when she’s shaking from an orgasm.

“Fuck,” Ryujin pants, blinking the tears away as she looks down at Yeji who has a cheek rested on top of her thigh, lazily pumping fingers inside of her, drawing out the aftershocks. “Come here.”

It’s weird to taste herself on Yeji’s tongue but oddly arousing. She’s well into licking her way inside Yeji’s mouth when the alpha pulls back, sitting on her haunches, the length of her straining against her underwear. Yeji cups herself, taking her cock out, the length of it curving intimidatingly towards her belly, and starts pumping with a loose fist.

The last time Ryujin saw her was hurried, the lights not on all the way, but seeing it now somehow makes it more intimidating. It twitches under her scrutiny, dwarfed by Yeji’s hand. They’re both quiet, soaking in the moment that they’re _finally_ doing this.

Yeji quietly rolls on a condom and Ryujin tamps down the urge to tell her to _hurry up_.

“Do we,” Yeji asks, hand steady on Ryujin’s thigh, the other still pumping preciously close to a fluttering entrance. “, do you need lube?”

Ryujin laughs suddenly, pulls Yeji on top of her, and doesn’t say anything when the alpha’s biceps strain from holding herself up, keeping their skin from touching each other just yet. “Yah, you were the one down there, you tell me.”

Yeji cracks a nervous smile, slowly lowering herself. Their breasts slide against each other, and Ryujin bites her lip when the underside of Yeji’s cock drags against her clit as she adjusts herself. Yeji rests her head under Ryujin’s chin, kissing it. “Hi.”

“Hello,” it’s so ridiculous how fond she is for this girl, combing stray hairs away from Yeji’s face and pecking a forehead. “I’m nervous.”

The alpha frowns, but nods. “Me too. But I won’t hurt you and I want to make this feel good for you.”

“Hey, I’m not complaining. I already had one orgasm, no rush.” It gets a laugh out of Yeji, settling more softly against her, and Ryujin momentarily forgets about what they were about to do when Yeji smiles at her like that. “Would you feel better if I’m on top?”

Yeji shudders, eyes closing momentarily like the visual of it is playing inside her mind. “Maybe next time,” she hesitates for a moment before nodding to herself, decided. “You ready?”

Talking seems to put them both at ease, Yeji’s body more confident as she hauls herself up after the younger girl’s affirmative. She kisses Ryujin deep the same time she takes her cock in hand, making tight circles on the omega’s clit with the head.

And then she positions herself, sliding in.

It’s hot, tight, and impossibly warm. Yeji concentrates on the flicker of emotions passing Ryujin’s face, alert for any sign of discomfort or pain. They hold their breaths, head swimming at the throbbing pleasure in between them.

Yeji pinches her thighs to distract herself from coming, barely half inside. It feels never-ending, pulsing around her, and she momentarily loses focus when Ryujin clenches inside of her. She slides inside all the way without any accidents, falling to her elbows as she breathes roughly against Ryujin’s ear, holding still.

She feels _full_. Ryujin accepts the moment of reprieve, can already feel the sheen of sweat on the alpha’s back as she takes hold of steady shoulders. One moment she was staring at Yeji and the next, she had her head thrown back as Yeji’s cock sinks inside her, slow and thick.

“Good?” the older girl asks, peppering kisses along Ryujin’s jaw. She doesn’t know if Ryujin can tell that she’s trembling, the quake of it translating even inside of her and it’s taking Yeji a whole lot of effort to keep herself in check.

“Yeah, yeah, just—“ Ryujin exhales, relaxes the muscles in her thighs, and opens her legs some more, adjusting to accommodate Yeji more comfortably against her. “Okay, I’m good. You can… move.”

Yeji counts to three in her mind, pulling her hips slowly and pushing in. The angle is a little off, but the depth of it bumps into something _close_ inside of her and Ryujin adjusts them both in between slow thrusts, telling Yeji how low should she drop her hips and how close she is to that one _spot_ that just might be the key to—

“ _Fuck!”_

Ryujin slaps the sheets, twisting when Yeji finds the perfect angle. It’s better than she expected. It’s explosive, numbing, and when Yeji thrusts in again, she _shouts_.

“Here?” Yeji makes sure, rolling hips picking up speed, relishing in the way Ryujin’s moans bounce off of the walls. She’s also tightening like crazy, drives Yeji a little bit to insanity, and with the omega’s vocal _yes, yes, fuck yeah, there_ , she decides she’ll never come if it means having Ryujin’s strong thighs closing around her tightly, the power in her hold keeping her close and moving.

But she can’t.

Ryujin can read the lines of strain on Yeji’s face, the same one she pulls when the choreography is just a touch too complicated for her to pick up in five minutes. She cups Yeji’s cheek and drags one down to play with her clit, making the alpha watch as she touches herself.

“You can come,” Ryujin shudders when Yeji whimpers, unrestrained and helpless, watching in awe as she plays with her clit. “I won’t take long so— “

“ _Oh my_ …” Yeji stills, pulsing and churns her hips hard once, twice, riding the high of her orgasm. She still has her eyes on Ryujin’s fingers, trying her best to continue the pace and it really doesn’t take long for Ryujin to flutter around her, both of them writhing, sweaty bodies.

She carefully pulls out after Ryujin’s legs relax on the bed, doesn’t know what to do with the condom. Ryujin doesn’t even pull her head up when she says: _tie the end then toss it_. Yeji laughs, feeling childish when she compares it with a balloon, then blushing when she realizes it’s literally _been_ inside of Ryujin.

“So,” Ryujin calmly starts even though her chest is still rising and falling rapidly, a pretty pink blush on her cheeks. “, that wasn’t so bad.”

Yeji snorts. “Oh my god,” she can’t help but kiss Ryujin soundly on the lips, the big smile on her face ruining it. “I like you so much.”

Whisker-like dimples appear on Ryujin’s cheeks, kissing the tip of Yeji’s nose fondly. “You’re not so bad yourself.”

They naturally gravitate together, Ryujin being the little spoon this time, and spends the afterglow just lying down, exchanging slow kisses and jokes.

When they get back to the dorm the next day—Yeji stayed at a convenience store so she arrives “half an hour later” than Ryujin did—she doesn’t mention that she took the whole box her mom bought for her. She also doesn’t bring up the _very_ encouraging text of her mom saying she approves of Ryujin and _she seems like a nice girl_.

Yeji’s toeing off her shoes by the front door, Jisoo leaning on the hallway with a ladle in her hand.

“Unnie,” she calls out, pointing the ladle at Ryujin who’s sitting at the kitchen island innocently. “, she’s glowing, right? I’m not imagining it?”

She glances at Ryujin, hiking her duffel bag higher on her shoulder, making a show of squinting at the youngest girl. “Mm, nah. Hard to tell with all the light.”

Ryujin laughs, full-bellied and enough to throw her off her seat, and Jisoo pouts.

“One of these days, Shin! One of these days!”

**::**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there’s another chapter coming, most likely the last one (and smuttier than this one) :D
> 
> thank you to my friend for this!
> 
> all mistakes are mine :D
> 
> please don’t forget to be kind to yourself today and drink water!
> 
> thank you, stay safe, and have a good one!

**Author's Note:**

> **follow the link/s on my[ twitter ](https://twitter.com/rexwrites/status/1341058168483315712?s=20)for updates and if you want to be my friend! :D **


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